A real gong show. The 1 hour flight to Munich from Amsterdam took 11 hours. Next time I will take the train. Initial flight was canceled so I had a long wait while they found a plane. When we finally arrived in Munich it took over 50 minutes to get our luggage. The Munich train station was another gong show with thousands of people vying for their departure trains with me being one of them. Yet, despite it all the countryside around Munich was picture perfect.
Stinking hot here. Humid too. Perfect to enjoy a balmy evening outside. We celebrated a family birthday for my hostess Margit last night. Wonderful evening. Schnitzel, German potato salad, lager and even some depth charges. Hangover inbound. Today I had a boat tour of a lake, some lunch at a biergarden and a short and a relaxing moment of reflection at a monastery that goes back to 1755.
Arrived in Amsterdam after an over nighter. Seat was cramped and harder than granny’s plastic covered upholstery. I felt like a sardine. Not fun. One would expect better for the prices we pay. On top of that I had to pay extra for my backpack. I had no choice given my trekking poles are considered weapons of mass destruction so they had to be checked. Ticked off? You bet. Other than that the flight was uneventful.
Getting my bag took longer than getting a letter from Canada post. Almost 2 hours to get my backpack. Me and others around me had our eyes on other people’s luggage. But, given my luck I probably would’ve ended up with baby clothes or that from a 2 ton trucker dude
But alas, all is now right with my world, except I am up at oh-dark – 30 writing ✍️ this. That is early for my non military friends out there. Of course, this helps.
Central Station Amsterdam
What baggage problem??
Oops, wrong picture from another trip. Tomorrow? Munich.
By the way, that is not me in the background. And Munich is in 🇨🇭 right???.
Off the Pilgrims go en masse: quickly, silently, aggressively with their tick, tick, tick walking sticks. Of course, in the minds of all the Pilgrims is to be the first Pilgrim at the first stop in order to get the best accommodations, and in that best of brotherly love and Pilgrim spirit…. screw you buddy, I am the first to go. So, in that raptured state of mind and spirit we fly away pumped and focused.
Now the modern Pilgrim has all the right stuff: every electronic gadget known to man – GPS, cell phone, adapters, solar chargers, radios, iPad, mini laptops, cords and plugs, aviator sunglasses, Columbia fleece vests, Tilley hats and all of the best. These guys and gals are normally gone by the end of the first week because the one thing they forgot to bring are blister bandages.
In that best of Pilgrim state of mind, we are to begin a spiritual existential (whatever that means) frame of consciousness. To discover oneself, one’s sense on being, belonging, synchronicity with the universe. Okay, that about takes care of day one but what about the other 44 days. One can only think of oneself for so long. I mean things can get boring fast. Well, don’t fret because the “The Pilgrim’s Life” has thought of everything. In a new book that has just come out called: “The Pilgrim’s Guide to the Universe” at a special one time offer of 49 euros, you can have it all. Chapter 5 has a list of profound topics that every Pilgrim can use for those profound “ah ha” moments of enlightenment and self discovery. Topics such as: “So Why Does the Sun Rise in the East and Set in the West? or “Is There Really a Man in the Moon?” or “Is the Moon Made of Green Cheese or Brie?” and then there is my own personal favorite: “Why Do Our Eyebrows Remain the Same Colour When Everything Else Turns Grey?” – topics that are sure to keep you engaged in thoughtful thoughts for your entire pilgrimage. All are very hot topics in today’s complicated unforgiving world.
As the Pilgrim hikes about the French or Spanish countryside, he or she will face many challenges. How to stay entertained? Well, at one of the Pilgrim training sessions they tell you and show you how to imitate farm animals like cows, roosters, sheep, and goats. This will keep you in laughter and those animals confused all the time during your trek. A real hoot. But the dogs are another matter. After a few days Pilgrims begin to smell really bad. A slight green hue or aura begins to appear around each Pilgrim. The air around a herd of Pilgrims undulates like the air around hot asphalt. Dogs can sense this and can smell a Pilgrim from miles away. But this is nothing new to the villagers. Going back to the days of the Plague, they know that they must have sufficient warning to hide their children, close their shops and cafes and remain upwind. Their dogs act like pickets such that when a Pilgrim approaches a small town or village the dogs sense a Pilgrim’s presence and start yelping and barking like dogs in heat. Thus, the villagers have enough time to shut down the entire village. And that is why nothing is open when a Pilgrim enters a small town, village, or hamlet throughout the French countryside. It is better in Spain, but they haver fewer dogs – goats mainly. All the villagers are hiding upwind of the Pilgrim.
Alas, a Pilgrim’s life is a challenging, lonely, and frustrating one. Only the chosen few are strong enough to survive the physical and psychological hurdles. But remain strong, positive and purchase the array of Pilgrim self help books and you can be a real-life Pilgrim too.
This You Tube video will give you a sense of the start of the Le Puy route. It is 30 minutes long but you can skip through it if you like:
Do the Walk of Life
I wish I had started hiking years ago and not when I was 67. Try it you will love it. There are great trails in and around the Cowichan Valley.
Leaving for Amsterdam today and the start of my next pilgrim adventure: Le Chemin De Puy. This will be a 740Kilomter trek from Le Puy En Velay to Saint Jean de Port, a beautiful town on the French side of the Pyrenees.
St Jean Pied de Port
Before I get into it I thought that I would introduce readers to the Pilgrim Life. Here is part one:
A Pilgrim’s Life
Pilgrims can be anybody. They come from all occupations. Judges; retired Naval Officers; mad French mathematicians; flying Dutchmen; crazy Germans; and others. Pilgrims show up en masse at Pilgrim starting places like Vezelay France or St Jean Pied de Port. Pilgrims are not allowed to swear; they are not allowed to have money, although most of them arrive via first class air or high-speed trains. No, no, no. Pilgrims can only suffer.
Because Pilgrims have no money, they have no alarm clocks with them. No matter, as most Pilgrim hostels are beside churches. And churches have church bells that go off at 6 am every morning. Precise. It is God’s clock, so they must be. The first time I experienced this it was frightening. You see, I had broken the second and third major Pilgrim rule in that I was having fun the night before at a singsong with some wine. You see, Pilgrims are not allowed to have fun (2nd rule) nor are they allowed to drink (3rd rule). No, Pilgrims are only allowed to suffer. So, you can imagine how distraught I was when those bells went off. I jumped out of bed and thought my head was exploding. Alas it was only the bells and not my head. Then again, a severe red wine hangover would fit right in with the Pilgrim’s code of conduct…major pain.
At that moment all the Pilgrims have one thing on their mind…toilet. And you thought those walking sticks were for walking. No, no, no. They are for fending off the other pilgrims while running to the toilet to be the first one in there.
Then the Pilgrim goes and has breakfast. Gruel because the 4 the rule of a Pilgrim is that you cannot enjoy food. You must suffer so our gruel has the texture and look of Metamucil, or…well, you get the disgusting picture. After gruel and cold stale coffee, the Pilgrim has a choice. He can start his daily walking grind or he / she can attend Pilgrim classes. There is: “How to be a Pilgrim 101;” Lessons in Self Flagellation;” The Pilgrim’s Handshake” and of course one of my favourites in “How to meet and greet other Pilgrims – the secret code word.” And for this one time only I am going to tell you what it is:” Buen Compestele.” But if you forget it, you can always say: “Pass the Pasta.” That will work as well. Which reminds me of the Pilgrim cookbook – an absolute must for the proper, discerning Pilgrim – “100 ways to cook pasta” also known as, and I love this part, “Pasta and the Pilgrim’s Life.” I know, I know, a real classic best seller.
So, what does a Pilgrim wear. Anything really. Modern or traditional. The traditional Pilgrims have those earth tone-coloured robes made of homespun wool. Itchy as hell…ooops sorry for swearing…They have these long hemp belts for a tight- or loose-fitting fit. Now you never want to be behind one of these pilgrims as they tend to roll up the hems to their waist as they are going up a steep hill such that…like a true Scott…their bare asses are staring right back at you. Not a pretty site. Oh, and those long hemp belts? Well, one tine I saw one of these Pilgrims cut a small piece of hemp and then roll it up in paper and smoke it. Bad, sacrilegious, blasphemy and a cardinal rule of the Pilgrim. You must…. you must pass it around.
Off the Pilgrims go en masse: quickly, silently, aggressively with their tick, tick, tick walking sticks. Of course, in the minds of all the Pilgrims is to be the first Pilgrim at the first stop in order to get the best accommodations, and in that best of brotherly love and Pilgrim spirit…. screw you buddy, I am the first to go. So, in that raptured state of mind and spirit we fly away pumped and focused.
19 days until Le Puy Camino. Follow my journey through this blog, which will begin 13 August as I head over to Amsterdam, then Munich, then Augsburg, then Le Puy via Paris, Lyon, Etienne and finally Le Puy.
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Liberal training video on how to obfuscate during Parliament’s House of Clowns Question Period:
From Canada’s Ministry of Silly Walks:
Note the request for a government grant. That would immediately get approval under Canada’s “DIE” initiative. Not MaID…DIE…you bast.rd.
Meanwhile, to combat Canada’s forest fire problem, the Department of Silly Firefighters has this training video to boost morale:
Central Station Amsterdam
What baggage problem??
