SH*T For Brains

Given all the protests out there I thought this past post was still relevant…..

Hidden Agenda? So who has the hidden agenda? Harper or Trudeau?

“Kinder Morgan is important for our national interest” Trudeau tells Canadians and then on the world stage tells France and European Leaders that he is ashamed of Alberta’s oil sands and will do all that he can to shut them down.

Commenting on the high price of gas in Vancouver and Victoria – most expensive in North America – well, he is in total agreement: “This is exactly what we want….yesssss!”

This puppet is out to destroy the Canadian economy and emasculate Alberta’s livelihood. He is a feminist after all. The premier of BC and his puppet-master, the leader of the green party, are ecstatic over this. The sad thing is that they were voted in in the first place and will probably win another term. Reminds me of my comment about MacDonald’s. They raised their menu prices and sales soared….duh?

See the source image“I have a dream…….man”

“And it doesn’t include you”

This gas thingy can really turn me on….man.Compared to Harper this man’s dream is a nightmare!

Have to laugh at a survey done about countries that have the most freedom. Sweden, Norway and Finland tied for first. Are you kidding me? These countries are probably the most regulated countries in the world. Consider 250 regulations on how cucumbers are to be grown and distributed. And, they have to be as strait as an arrow man-people. They, the cucumbers that is, cannot be bent. Well, is that freedom? Straight? The LGBTQRSTUVWXY and Z crowd in these places are all in a tizzy over that bit of news. No, no, no.. you cannot do what you want in these places and the taxes are sky high. Just ask a cucumber farmer and he’ll tell you straight up!

The UN is all excited about this one. If the Scandinavian countries can pull “the sheep’s wool” over our eyes with this stat just think what we could do with the sale and regulation of “wellies” all over the sheep farming world. Finally, a new world order. “One world government here we cum…er come!” the head of the UN – who wished to remain anonymous – remarked recently.

And, have you seen Sweden lately?

See the source image“We want to be like Norway!”

“Their cucumbers are straighter than ours…shameful!”

A Swedish cucumber grown in Sweden’s red light district:

The response was immediate:

Sweden’s cucumber riot squad hit the streets:

“And what about Swedish meat balls?” someone asked

“Don’t even go there!” the police responded.

And in Finland? The # 1 freedom country in the world? Just as straight as can be man!

Next week? Zucchinis!

From the…they just cannot give it up file comes this headline from the Hill:

“Impeachment Looms Large in the White House”

Just one day after the leader of South Korea stated publicly that Trump should win the Nobel Peace Prize for his efforts in ending the Korean War and bringing peace to the peninsula after 63 years….Geesh.

“Yeah but….” Nancy Pelosi, who wishes to remain anonymous, stated categorically. “We all know it was Bernie Sanders who played his cards appropriately in this showdown with North Korea, not Trump.

“Damn you Who Flung Poo” Bernie shouted at the leader of North Korea while at the negotiating table. “Hearts are trump, not spades….hearts” Poo took out his clubs and whacked Bernie with all he had.

“I call” he said.

Bernie, in desperation yelled. “This is Bridge you idiot…Bridge. Not some international poker game. This is serious business. It saved me during my University days…… I’ll lead off here with…. “jacks””

“Okay? Fish!” Poo answered.

And so it was. Bernie Sanders played Euchre with the leader of North Korea all day and finally won. For his efforts and perseverance he is up for the 2019 Nobel Peace Prize in trumping North Korea.

As for Trump? Last time I heard it was diamonds.

It would appear these guys have sh*t for brains:

Beckham shows off his latest tattoos

a man wearing a blue shirt

 

Just wait until you are old and wrinkly dude.

Only in Canada would you hear or see this headline…and in French too!

And in typical Liberal…ese……”Well, it depends! Are you a man-people or a wo-people?”

“Neither. Hey, I am a zay, maybe a zee, or a zit, or a zat. Mr More-Dough…Canada’s financial wizard dude”

And from another original Canadian thought comes this:

Ottawa demands that North Korea abandon its nuclear program.

Or else, we will send our covert surveillance resources to spy on you!

The leader of North Korea responds in kind:

“Can Canadian slub slink? Me slinks not”

I can see you Canada…ooooo, I am soooo scared.

Enough of this, or that, or zay, zee, zits or zat.

Non Binary? The gift that keeps on giving to bloggers like me.

Song of the Day:

A very young Johnny Depp

Have a great Navy Day and a great weekend. Read ya Monday.

SJ…………………………………….Out

Darwinian

Couple of incidences occurred over the holidays that came to my attention. One of these merits a Darwin Award nomination. For those that don’t know The Darwin Award is given to those individual(s), who by some nefarious deed, attempt some stunt, or conduct some activity that when executed correctly potentially saves mankind in an indirect manner by taking themselves, and hence their potential offspring, out of the gene pool.

Runners up to this award are those individuals who survive their deeds but are sure to succeed at another time through sheer personal tenacity, or what others would call…stupidity.

Potential Darwin Award winners and runner ups:

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Don’t try this at home:

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Team awards are also given out:

See the source imageIt would appear that some dude wanted to inflate his king size air mattress to use in one of his spare bedrooms at home. Rather than use traditional means of inflation such as physical blowing through his mouth or the use of a hand pump, this dude took one of those aerosol tire inflators to do the job. As it was late in the evening and the lighting was dim in this room he decided to light a candle such that he could see what was going on. A few minutes into this routine a loud explosion was heard emitting from the back of the house. His son ran down to the room to find out what all the commotion was all about. When he opened the door to the bedroom he was shocked to see that the back exterior wall had been blown out; the window shattered with such force that shards of glass were found across the street in the neighbours yard and that his father was still alive but required immediate medical treatment for a collapsed lung. As he was being helped into the ambulance he could be heard muttering: “I should have read the instructions, I should have read the instructions.”

Yes dude you should have, but after all, you are a male.

The only good thing that came out of all of this was that he now had the opening for the rear bedroom balcony that he always wanted for this room.

Another incident occurred at a bar in small town Wisconsin over the holiday period. It would appear that the bartender , in keeping with the holiday spirit changed the music video channel of the large screen TV from one that was playing “Classic Rock” to one that was playing traditional Christmas tunes. This didn’t go over well for one patron given that “Black Sabbath” was currently playing. He didn’t appreciate hearing “Oh Holy Night” and made his displeasure known to one and all by systematically destroying the interior of the establishment. This did not go over well and the “holy shit” hit the fan. The Cops were called but this dude managed to escape but not before his licence plate information was recorded. Ultimately the police tracked him down and attempted to arrest him at his home. He had to be tasered. He spent the entire holiday season in cells where traditional holiday music was being piped in.

And the Darwin award goes to:

After watching this I realized that while I may be 67 years old I do have a juvenile sense of humour….yes….too funny!

This has to be one of my all time favourite classic Christmas tunes:

Have a great Navy day.

SJ……………………………………….Out

 

This Takes It To The Limit!

This just in! From a Social Justice Warrior Professor. Is there any other kind?

“That’s actually where the connection lands between white liberalism and white supremacy because it’s by maintaining law and order and by maintaining civility by keeping your front lawn nice and tidy and by putting that ‘all are welcome in our communities’ sign on your front lawn, you are denying the fact that all the while you are with the other hand passing money to a deadly institution that polices with great disparity and causes tragic, tragic harm to the communities that are our neighbors and the communities that we actually should be building forward with.”

Huh??????

So mowing my lawn is racist huh?. Great, I will never cut my grass again. Thanks Professor. By the way, this professor teaches English literature and grammar. This has to be the longest sentence evah!

A SJW Mantra or put another way: University spells Diversity

 

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The student’s words speak for themselves, don’t ya think? Hate! Don’t ya just love being a SJW Professor?

Why would anyone in their right mind go to University these days?

Little known facts:

  • Abraham Lincoln founded the Republican Party
  • Every confederate state was Democrat

Get out the Laxative.

Gotta love this headline:  “The Pope’s Laxity Catches Up With Him:”  when talking about the latest Vatican sex scandal involving one of his closest buds. No story here. Move on.

“You know, the Pope is a pretty regular guy!” one Vatican official was heard to say. “Yeah, maybe but he’s on the run now!”

“Is the Pope really Catholic,” a reporter asked.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk” retorted the effeminate Vatican official. “Does a bear shyte in the woods? Of course he is. In fact not only is the Pope Catholic but he hails from Ontario!”

“Ah that’s two strikes against him.” The reporter thought as he moved away. No story here. Move on.

And the scandals just keep on cumming!

And on another papal front, this political Pope is celebrating the 60th anniversary of the Cuban Revolution!

Damn, a Catholic, who hails from Ontario and is a fan of Communism. That’s three strikes against him. Poor guy.

A Papal mystery of life – if the Pope and other Clergy take a vow of poverty then why are they all against poverty and the poor? Huh? Huh?

Another mystery of life: why is it that when everything else goes grey and slows down on one’s body, one’s eyebrows stay the same colour and grow out like weeds in a summer’s heat?? Huh? Huh?

See the source imageSee! I can tell that when he was young he had really black hair. I wonder how the nose hairs are doin??

Comb-overs are next!

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From the Bizarro file comes this:

Man caught licking door bell for over three hours…Damn, nobody was home. The only thing that saved this perv was that he had to go so bad that he relieved himself on the front lawn. Apparently while licking the doorbell he read an article about some SJW professor and his/her rant about racist lawns.

Toronto Police official hails Toronto’s diversity and political correctness policies as a major strength of the force and a model for others to follow. Meanwhile Toronto’s homicide rate is the highest evah and is going through the roof. One police officer was heard in passing while investigating a crime scene:

“Gee my fellow Torontonians of neutral race and natural, neutral gender, can I please have that AK 47? Hmmm? Pretty please?”

New James Bond film’s lead to be a Transgendered:

“My name is Bond, Jane or James Bond. Makes no difference to me!”

Latest from the NYT also known as CNN’s print medium.

See the source image                Nuff said……I want to get off the planet………………now.

First verse of that classic Eagles tune sung by a soulful master Etta James

Fabulous

Another wonderful Super Dave Osborne stunt. R.I.P. Bob Einstein

Have a great Navy day.

SJ…………………………………………..Out

Mumbo Jumbo

Any male or female accused of and convicted of sexual assault should be drawn and quartered….but there are limits:

Consider this from an earlier post:

Interesting read about Patrick Brown, the Ontario Conservative Party Leader, who resigned amid allegations of sexual misconduct. Appears he did something bad a number of years ago when he was single and available.

Allegationists have come out now with their allegations. Why now? Why not a year ago? 10 years ago? In this new caustic environment it’s okay to destroy someone – normally a male – without a shred of evidence. Why? Because it was a female complainant. No other reason. It must be true. I’m waiting for the first male to spout off a sexual allegation against a female. See where that takes ya. And bully to our Prime Minister who supports the sexual vigilantism in all of its nastiness. Of course he is a feminist isn’t he? But his actions against that reporter at that  music festival went unheeded. No story here. Move on..as related by the liberal media in this country. Could it be that he, Trudeau, is untouchable because he is a progressive, a liberal? And Brown is one of those nasty, nasty conservatives? Hmmm? Hmmm? And Trudeau has nice hair.

My two words of advice to all the males out there:

Beware of Cougars (oops, sorry that’s three)

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A “Cougar” is defined as an older woman attracted to younger men. On the prowl sort of.

Whereas an Alligator (my definition):

Is any woman out there ready to devour or destroy the reputation, livelihood and well being of any male it has her sights on – without due course, due diligence, due evidence, or due process. Just due allegations! It’s just a “let’s dues this” and eat him up for breakfast. We’re due they, the radical feminists, were due to say. Let’s go after that due’d and eat him up.
See how the Alligator laughs in this photo. Yes…she knows!

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Men are screwed.

But beware all of you radical feminists out there. Chivalry is dead now. You have just put the last nail into the “gentlemanly coffin.” I mean I’m an old fart, a grumpy, grampy old man, well past his best before date but if I was younger I would definitely do things differently in today’s toxic atmosphere. No more holding the door open, paying for dinner, compliments, drinks or whatever. I would belch, fart, grunt, swear, pick my nose, and scratch my ass – wiggle me nuts – tell dirty jokes, well perhaps not, and – y’know all of those things that define a male – in front of you. And, I would think twice about working with a woman because you just never know. It could be next week, next month, a year from now, maybe 10 years from now, as is Brown’s case, and wham – a sexual innuendo allegation from an “Alligator” comes your way. No defence, no evidence, just hearsay and buddy you are screwed. Nuff said.

On the “Trudeau Strong and Free” front

Another one of Trudeau’s mandate tracking letters:

“The Government of Canada has reached agreements with all provinces and territories on collective priorities and 10-year funding to strengthen health care. In August 2017, federal, provincial and territorial (W – T – F) governments reached agreement on a Common Statement of Principles on Shared Health Priorities, which outlines key priorities for federal investments to improve access to mental health and addictions services, as well as home and community care and a joint commitment to advance health innovation and prescription drugs.”

What does all this mean? No idea! Transparency again. It is so transparent that we can all see through it. All I know is that this mandate has been actioned as “completed.” Well, the home support care my wife received before she passed was awful, and my son had to wait 10 months for essential varicose vein surgery on one leg while being told there would be an equally long wait for surgery on his other leg. The Doctors from Lego were not amused. They just nodded their legs…er heads in agreement. Yes, completed my ass…no leg you idiot!

Other stuff:

Poor Melania Trump. Doesn’t matter what she does or says she is vilified by those people who are just so damn tolerant and compassionate – don’t you know. Like these two:

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Hypocrisy knows no bounds. Three cheers for the Holly’s Woody in the Morning Crowd………………………………Geeesh!

Oprah for President? Are you kidding me? Okay, all you radical feminists out there. Where’s the outcry here? And don’t say Oprah didn’t know. You wouldn’t give the same courtesy to Melania Trump.

 

Dedicated to all of those beautiful woman out there. All women are beautiful. Another song that pulls you in and gets you up and on your feet: Mumbo Jumbo…yes…er Mambo #5 If there were more dance tunes like this out there, there would be world peace!

R.I.P

Bob Einstein, also known as Super Dave Osborne has died. He was 76. Remember this comedian for his dead pan delivery. Loved watching him on the Super Dave Osborne show back in the 70s and 80s:

Keep dancing and have a great Navy day.

SJ……………………………Out

Don’t Worry, Be Happy

Congrats to the Finns. They won the World Juniors and Spengler Cup. Swiss put on a great show. Same for the USA.  Canada…not so much. Next year,

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I just re-read a prediction the Sierra Club of Canada made about 10 years ago about how Victoria would look under 75 feet of water and how the various areas around the CRD would be affected. I remember writing a letter to the editor at the time – a time when Global Warming hysteria really began – about this very prediction. I think it is worth repeating here because much of it is still relevant:

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Victorians are gurgling with excitement over rising sea levels! Alan Lowe (Mayor of Victoria) and the Sierra Club’s dire prediction of Victorian flooding of biblical proportions because of Global Warming got me to thinking:

  • If you thought the leaky condo issue was big news, standby for heavy rolling;
  • Our buildings have already been upgraded for earthquakes. It’s now time to make them waterproof;
  • Just think, BC Ferries can now depart from downtown Victoria;
  • Kinda brings a whole new meaning to the Colwood crawl, don’t ya think;
  • Forget Light Rapid Transit. Make way for fast water taxis;
  • Getting rid of those “Fast Cat” ferries may have been a wee bit premature;
  • We won’t have to address our sewage treatment issues. Clover and Macaulay Point will be so far underwater that no one will notice. I hear Methane floats though!
  • We could establish a new tourist attraction: The Clover and Macaulay Point “Hot Springs”
  • The Premier and MLAs need not to fret. We can always move the BC legislature up into the dome – that is when they sit of course. The men and women Under the Dome;
  • How about this for a new marketing strategy for Victoria’s tourist industry: “Venice of the North”
  • Small businesses shouldn’t worry. A whole new growth industry could be established in gondolas, scuba gear and undersea gardens and shops;
  • Agricultural Land Reserve?? No problem. Just change the name to Aqua-Cultural Land Reserve. After all, Government can do whatever it wants;
  • Unfortunately though, a new building code will require that all existing downtown buildings over 75 ft in height will have to have jetties and bollards installed above the 75 ft level. Buildings under 75 ft????? Well, they’ll be waterproofed won’t they?

Another crazy prediction from the environ – mentalists that turned out to be all wet.

Here are a few more:

Maldives will be underwater by 01 January 2018 – this according to the UN’s dire prediction in 1988.

I checked so you don’t have to: Maldives, January 1 2018:

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Has anyone seen my island??

Vanuatu? Still there but hey, give us a gazillion dollars anyway.

According to Al “Baby” Gore the Arctic will be entirely ice free by 2013. Last time I checked:

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What did  Al have to say about all of this? Not much but……

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When comedy used to be funny:

 

Don’t worry, be happy. Check out Robin Williams at a time when he was happy!

Only problem now is, is that I will have this tune in my head all day.

 

Have a great Navy Day

SJ…………………………………out