Category: A Very Short Story

From the Short Story Vault

I Won’t Back Down

Still finding it hard to get into things, what with the mass shooting in Vegas and some of the lefty reactions to it. I won’t even grace these pages to mention some of the vitriol directed at these victims by some of the intolerant left. Soo much hate and intolerance out there for our fellow man. It makes me sick.

 

Another sad note. Heard that Tom Petty died yesterday, although some reports mentioned he is still alive. Don’t know for certain.

Appropriate song: I Won’t Back Down: Enjoy and pray for Peace!

From You Tube:

 

Poker Face

Only 95 days until Maldives disappear, according to the UN. 01 January 2018.

Image result for Pics of Maldives

Headline: Kardashian pregnant with her boyfriend’s baby. How did that happen? Well if Bruce Jenner can become a woman then I guess anything is possible. Transferring babies? Wow. The Trans community is all in a tizzy.

Top chefs reveal their trade secrets. That’s easy one was heard to say. I use “Take-Out! Or I brown bag it. That way nobody can see my trade secrets!”

 

Image result for Pics of take-outImage result for Pics of take-out

 

Hefner dies at 91. It was a great ride huh Hugh. Great memories of growing up with that icon hidden under my bed!

In Canada recently a family got asylum. The husband was rejected. “He just wasn’t crazy enough” a government official announced. I mean “Maybe next time.”

In response to Trudope’s taxation legislation that is going to screw the middle class: “I didn’t vote in the rast erection” a Japanese Canadian was heard to say.

So the NFL, CFL and now NHL are going to continue with their bended knee protests of the National Anthems. Great I can just TFL: This Fan Left and change the channel. See how that works for ya all. What is going on here these days? Is anyone happy anymore? What happened to our role models?

Image result for pics of athlete protestWhose going home tonight folks?

Other things of note: Colbert is just not funny. Oliver is just not funny. Maher is just not witty, or funny. American comedy is on the skids. SNL? 40 years of crap. Can that canned laughter machine and hear just how stupid their monologues are. Thinking the other day about this and then thought about Jack Benny. Now this guy was funny:

The master of the visual understatement.

Rewarding rigor: as in rewarding high academic achievement in schools. Sorry guys but that type of rigor is now known as “Rigor Mortis” in our institutions of higher learning.

 

They say that France and other old European countries have about 40 years remaining before becoming Muslim in their majority demographic. It’s also happening here. I thank my God that I’ll be dead and gone well before then. How do you spell relief Virginia: S…H…A…R…I…A! I can only hope and pray that a new Charles “the hammer” Martel is in the wings somewhere!

Heard in passing at an open air poker game: “Well that’s great infidel. I’ll see your 1.5 children and raise you 10!” How’s that! I call….

 

US Navy returning to basics after disastrous month of collisions at sea. Wow, they are going back to using compasses and pencils and forcing young officers of the watch to learn and implement the international agreement for Rules of the Road at sea. “Yeah, but where are the bike lanes? I don’t see any out here!” One raw recruit was heard to say. He was immediately reassigned to the Army……….Geesh.

 

 

 

SJ………………………Out.

 

Me? A Fashion Faux Pas

Only 96 days until the Maldives are under water according to a 1988 UN report on Global Warming. Maldives today:

Image result for pics of the maldivesBut Canada knows better because we are Climate Change smug!

 

Have ya heard?

Venezuela is about to declare war on the US. Great but I have one question for them. How ya going to feed your troops?

Seems like North Korea is about to declare war on the US as well. See above remark.

Image result for pics of north korea army crazy hatsThose hats would scare anyone but they don’t put food on the table. Hey these guys are pretty old as well. Did they take a page out of the Canadian Military. Even the cat is dumbfounded. Gotta love those medals as well. Nah, Trump has nothing to worry about.

This from the Moonbat State: Coffee to be banned cause there is a minute trace cancer agent that exists as a natural byproduct of the brewing process. Man these guys are really going after smokers aren’t they?

Fashion faux pas men make:

Slide 1 of 11: <p>Style mistakes are something a man generally wants to avoid.</p><p> And style mistakes that the opposite sex has voted as the most egregious? Well, you'd better listen up.</p><p> Female commenters on Reddit's <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/201rhx/whats_the_worst_fashion_mistake_a_man_could_make/"> r/AskWomen subreddit</a> were asked to vote on what they consider to be the worst style blunders they see on men.</p><p> We've rounded up the 10 most upvoted sins and coupled them with advice on how to best avoid them.</p>I don’t see the problem here folks. Socks are clean, sandals look brand new. This is “fashion faux pas” after all. Or perhaps this is a statement about white privilege! Whatever, but if I want to look ridiculous then gal darn it anyway, I will. Nice thing about being an old fart: you don’t give a damn anymore what people think.

Yeah, but this is cool…not:

Image result for pics of mens short suit jackets

And with a hairstyle to boot.

 

Kind of reminds me of this:

Image result for pics of nazi youthAnd this:

Image result for pics of nazi book burningOr is this an ANTIFA training camp?……………..Geesh.

Are sea levels rising? Nope. But one stupid dude tried to tell me that sea levels in the western Pacific are rising dramatically more than the sea levels in the eastern Pacific. Think about that statement. Another told me that Archimedes worked for Big Oil!………..Geesh!

Global Warming models now appear to have been flawed: erring on the hot side….Geesh. They’re now trying to say that they used the wrong glue:

Image result for pics of funny model buildings

 

I don’t know about you but all I do now is look out my windows every morning when I rise. Is it a sweater / jacket day or not?

Surprise of the day: now that the NDP have formed government, NDP insiders fill important government jobs! Noooooo, say it ain’t so Rocky!

 

That’s all for today.

 

SJ…………………………Out

 

Just Thinkin Man

Have to go out so no post today. This is a repeat from November 2016. Back tomorrow.

 

“Hey Jay, Howzit goin eh?”                  Hey, where are the Pigeons?   

“Hey George. Long time no read.”

“Bin here Jay. What’s going on these days?”

“Pretty quiet in Cyber-land George. Craziness has toned          down somewhat. Weird and Whacky as well.

The Progs are at it though. Pretty bad case of THC going on.”

“THC Jay? Is it 420 day already? Oh yeah. Right! Here’s to all the stoners out there.”

“No, no, no George. Not THC as in “Weed” but as in Trump Hysteria Condition”

“Right.  How so?”

” The Dems and Progressives want to overturn erection results! Want Electoral Colleges to renege vote for Trump in December and solidly stand upright for Hillary”

“Why Jay?”

“To save Democracy George, of course……”

“I think I need a stiff drink Jay.”

“They also want to abolish the Electoral Colleges. Something that has been a part of their electoral process, their democracy since 1776.  Seems Founding Fathers had it all wrong. They didn’t heed Nostradamus’ warning.”

“Who?”

“Nostradamus George. Nostradamus. The French Prophet and toothsayer who lived in the 1500s.”

“He did Jay? Good Gawd. How’d he end up in 1776?”

“It would appear that Nostradamus predicted Trump’s win over Hillary.”

“They state that in Quatrane 10,666 Nostradamus wrote:

“BUCINUM Hillary verberat.

LAPSUS pergit. Bill est saevire,

Fundamentum rimas,

In furorem sine comitiis.”

“Crikey Jay, speak English!”

“Sorry George. But I did take Latin for 5 years in high school. I was…veritably good at it.”

“Here it is, as translated, it means……………………..”Hillary got Trumped in Spades”

“Seems the Founding Fathers missed that bit of sagery during their “Bridge” break while writing the Constitution.”

“And from the “Play Dough” and “Safe Space” crowd George comes this bit of THC:”

“GOP is the most dangerous organization in History.”

“Wow, worse than the 3rd Reich? Stalin’s Communism?…..The Brady Bunch Jay?”

 

“Oh, and COP 22 is going on. Or has just finished in Marrakech

“Marrakech, as in Africa’s Marrakech Jay? I thought the Cop’s 22nd Division was in, as in Toronto.

“No, no George. Not the Police Cops but as in Community of Parties COPs – as in Climate Change.”

“Canada sent 225 delegates to the Party.” Wow. Was it BYOB Jay?”

“How’d they get there Jay? By Camel?” Or the Marrakech Express?

“No, Camels can’t swim George. No, they all flew over from Ottawa.”

“In a hot air balloon Jay?”

“Good one George.”

“Heard in passing George that Ryerson students, when interviewed recently, and when asked, felt that Canadian Peacekeepers should be deployed to the nations of Karach and Wakonda to stop the insurrections there and to thwart further production of “Vibranium” (Rebel Media, 22 Nov 16)”

“The future of mankind George. Scary! I wonder if Nostradamus predicted this in his 10,667th unfinished Quatrane:

“Alumni idiotae”

…………………….

University Superioria

…………………….

“Something about higher learning me thinks”

 

“Y’know George. Green used to be my favourite colour. But now? I hate anything and everything green. I even killed my lawn. It is now brown in colour. And, I hate that word sustainability, transparency and I also hate that linguistic combination of two simple words… a conjunction of a perposition….”as in”!!………….STOP IT!

Shakey Jay….out!

* Pic by Wikimedia