Music to My Ears

Words from “Where do the Children Play” From “Tea for the Tillerman,” Cat Stevens, 1970. A time when music meant something.

Will you make us laugh
Will you make us cry
Will you tell us when to live
Will you tell us when to die

Sound familiar? I think we’re just about there, don’t you?

There’s more to music than Taylor Swift or Gaga’s Poker Face you know. Check out Cat Steven’s “Father and Son.” Makes a grown man cry.

Other nonsense:

This just in from Ontario, Canada. Seems that the Premier’s new Math strategy is failing students miserably. Falling behind their own Provincial Standards. “Yeah, well these Grade 6 students know a great deal about oral sex you know.” said one parent. The Province’s sex ed program,which starts in Kindergarten, has been a great success.

On another note: Province’s teen pregnancy rates going through the glass ceilings.

On another, another note. “Yeah, well just lower the Standards Bar. That’ll solve the problem, “toute suite.”  Just like we did for our Province’s French spelling standard.

Oh yeah but: New ancient Math tablet discovered. Will change everything we thought we knew about the new Math.

See the source image

1 + 1 = 3…Yikes

On another, another, another note: Province’s education minister calling out those parents who complain about the math program as suffering from”Mathaphobia.”  “They will be dealt with” he, she and heyz announced.

At a recent press conference, Justin Trudeau called U.S.-based Haitians entering Quebec “irregular” immigrants, as opposed to illegal ones, even though they are illegal.

On another note, and following Trudeau’s comments, a Canadian government official, The “Minister for Illegal Immigration,” who wishes to remain anonymous, says that Keopectate will be issued to all new irregulars. Trudeau then left for his latest round of international meetings and important discussions with foreign leaders and Heads of State.

“No Mum, this is the way to do the Macarena.”

Image result for pictures of justin trudeau and merkel

“Hey Mutti, I just passed Ontario’s sex education program.”

“Wonderbra Justin. I’m so excited.”

 

Over and out…………………………..SJ

Mumps and Tight Undies

The Canadian Standards Association (CSA) is seriously serious about the environment.  Seriously.  In fact, they’ve proudly announced their intention to insert climate change things and stuff into their standards.  “These projects,” said CSA, “aim to mitigate infrastructure vulnerabilities caused by extreme weather events to help keep Canadians safer.”

I think I would be a lot safer if CSA would only stay out of my life. Stick to standards and stop trying to save me from idiot organizations like….??

 

More than a third of Californian households at risk of losing everything. The Moonbat State’s latest legislation to enforce everyone to hold their breaths for a minute at a time to reduce CO2 levels will do nothing to mitigate this crisis. “Yep but gall darnit anyway, we’ll have the cleanest air in the country, perhaps the planet,” a member of the state’s legislature was heard to say. The others farted in agreement as they held their breaths and plugged their noses.

 

Alberta’s United Conservatives Party. A spokesperson said that the party would pander to the unions while supporting business. Say what? Someone was then heard to ask:

“When are we going to elect that oxy moron as leader of this new party?”

 

According to the “Rolling Stone” magazine, the “Baby Boomer” generation’s secular manifesto in magazine form, says that: “For Western civilization Trudeau is our last hope……………….FOR DOPE?

“Yeah man.” Heard in passing: “Who reads Rolling Stone anymore?”

When will we get rid of these narcissistic poofters disguised as national leaders. Get this guy some clothes…quick.

Can you imagine if we had leaders like this during the Second World War? We would be doomed.

 

Petronas pulls out of huge Canadian LNG project. Can’t handle the bureaucratic mumble jumble anymore. 7 years and counting and still no commitment from the Province of BC or the Feds. This on the heels of the Northern Gateway cancellations followed on the toes of the up and coming Kinder Morgan cancellation, Site C dam cancellation and others.

But hey, we’re Canadians so we know better than anybody else.

Only in Canada you say……………….shitty

 

A Muslim Miss World contest? How can this be? One judge was heard to say: “The Bhurka competition was a real challenge. No clear winner emerged!”

If Climate Change wasn’t enough to scare the beejeezus out of us:  “Shocking’ fall in sperm counts in the West have doctors warning against human extinction”…..Geesh. I thought Climate Change had that all wrapped up. But reading into this comes the clincher: “declining sperm quality and quantity to exposure to chemicals and pesticides — as well as to lifestyle factors, including stress, obesity and habits such as wearing tight underpants.”

Hey, what about the “Mumps”

Tell this to the Indians, Chinese and particularly….the Muslims, whose stated aim is to take over the world, not by the sword but by demographics.

“I’ll see your two point five children infidel and raise you 10.”

 

California, The Moonbat State, has too much Marijuana and can’t get rid of its surplus.

On another note the State’s anti smoking legislation hits a new high. Its hold your breath for a minute every 5 minutes hits a new low and has a huge impact on its bottom line. Flatulence levels soar.

Too bad that they can’t grow more money.


 

SJ……out.

 

 

Where’s the Beef?

Why do they do this? I was starting to read this article on the internet about the 100 most unhealthy foods. By the end of the article I was starving. Of course all of my major food groups made the list. Like this one:

Unhealthy yes but boy oh boy does it taste gooood.

Slide 8 of 102: Unhealthy Ingredients: Butylated Hydroxytoluene (BHT), Butylated Hydroxyanisole (BHA), refined carbs, added sugarThere’s no sugar-coating it: sugar wreaks havoc on the body. Consuming too much of the white stuff can lead to obesity, which often causes other health problems like diabetes and heart disease. And many cereals pack more sugar into one bowl than you’ll find in a Boston Cream Donut! To make matters worse, many popular varieties like Frosted Flakes and Fruity Pebbles are also laced with Butylated Hydroxytoluene (BHT) or BHA (Butylated Hydroxyanisole), ingredients that are banned in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, Japan, and much of Europe because they are thought to be carcinogenic. You’ll also want to check out the 20 Worst “Healthy” Cereals.Eat This! Instead: Cascadian Farms Chocolate O’s and Nature’s Path Peanut Butter Panda Puffs are both flavor-packed, low-sugar picks that don’t contain any scary chemicals.Froot Loops. After following this strict diet I started to look like this guy:

See the source imageor maybe this gal:

U.S. Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) arrives to listen to Michael Cohen, the former personal attorney of U.S. President Donald Trump, testify at a House Committee on Oversight and Reform hearing on Capitol Hill in Washington, U.S., February 27, 2019.

How much can you press? Alexandra Occasionally Cortez But Generally Wacko thinks she is as strong as a man. She also read the same internet article about food:

“Her latest move has caused some commentators to say that Alexandra Occasionally Cortez But Generally Wacko wants to ban hamburgers. Former Trump advisor Sebastian Gorka told the Conservative Political Action Conference last week: “They want to take your pickup truck! They want to rebuild your home! They want to take away your hamburgers! This is what Stalin dreamt about but never achieved!”

Perhaps not but this guy might be a tad upset:

See the source image“I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.”

On another note she used to work at a Taco Stand. Last time I checked Tacos were loaded with hamburger.


Speaking of hamburgers: Where’s the beef?

Man accused of stealing $100,000 in beef tenderloin. One would have to ask the question…why? For his repentance and penance he is now a spokesman for Alexandra Occasionally Cortez But Generally Wacko.

Why not just rob a bank?

Speaking of jobs. University of Toronto is offering a free, relaxed, non judgemental hand-job workshop.

I think I’ll sign myself up as a mature student.

And not to be outdone don’t miss the rise and fall of the “Sex Week Symposium” at prestigious Yale University – the pole standard of Ivey League sex education.

Meanwhile in Canada our feminist Prime Minister is having a very bad week, and it’s only Tuesday. Seems that many of his female cabinet ministers have had enough and have abandoned this ship of fools. Last I heard one was off to the University of Toronto and the other to Yale.

They’re hiring?


House of Glass or throw the first stone. Gotta love this one:

Two political action committees founded by Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s top aide funneled over $1 million in political donations into two of his own private companies, according to a complaint filed with the Federal Election Commission on Monday. Noooooooo waaaaaay, ho-zay, say it ain’t so Alexandra Occasionally Cortez But Generally Wacko.

Love this too:

Don’t ya just love hypocrites?

I can’t take anymore.

I wonder what’s going on in Europe these days?

Oh well. It’s just the world I know:

https://youtu.be/Q7Yunydh2KQ

Have a great Navy day.

SJ…………………………………………..Out

If My Mother Was a Truck!

Love it.

Global Warming Redux:

Not Canada but northern US states – Iowa, Nebraska, Minnesota: I 80 and I 90.

Good old fashioned winters are making a comeback.

White privilege? You can have it.

Toronto could see about 10-20 cm of snow today. And this is news why?? Hey people, it’s still winter and this is Canada after all:

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Mystery(ies) of life:

“Only people of colour are allowed in.”

“Hey I’m white. Isn’t that a colour?”

Why is it that every time I park my car in a shopping mall parking lot, some guy or gal in a very large pickup truck parks right beside me making it very,very difficult for me to back out safely? Huh? Huh?

Why do so many sick people shop in health food stores?

If our food is going to kill us, as environmentalists claim, then why oh why are we living so long? Hmmm?

Why do my eyebrows stay the same colour when everything else turns grey?

And why do they spell grey gray in the US but grey everywhere else to describe the colour grey gray…eh? How can we ever attain world peace when we cannot even agree on the spelling of a certain colour, or a mood, or even the use of the letter “u” in certain words? Huh?


Liberal logic:

“A law is a law. What kind of a law? It’s a law. A law is a law. Until it’s not a law.”

Just like Chretien’s famous liberal line: “You want proof? The proof is in da proof is da proof. If it wasn’t proof it wouldn’t be poo…er true. If my mother had 4 wheels she would be a truck!” And with that profundity he made it to the top in politics  in Canada as our illustrious Prime Minister.

Following suit and not to be outdone by his liberal predecessor our current Prime Minister comes out with: “the budget will balance itself.” or equally profound is his response to a question about mankind “we like to say people-kind, not mankind, because it is more inclusive.” I can’t make this stuff up.

I wonder what the indoctrination week is like for new liberal MPs and newly elected liberal Prime Ministers:

Perhaps this….See the source imageFollowed by this….See the source image


At an event on Friday, Alexandra Ocasionally Cortez But Generally Wacko complained about criticism of her Green New Deal — much of it coming from her own party — that it’s a pipe dream. Former Virginia Gov. Terry McAuliffe, for example, said that “there are things that are great goals, but are unrealistic.”

Ocasionally Cortez’s response: “Some people are like, ‘Oh, it’s unrealistic, oh it’s fake, oh it doesn’t address this little minute thing. And I’m like, ‘You try! You do it.’ ‘Cause you’re not. ‘Cause you’re not. So, like until you do it, like I’m the boss. How ’bout that like, like, like?”  Good gawd and what exactly did she say right there.

Occasionally art but generally wacko:


Just read an article about the 10 signs that a divorce is imminent. I know of only one sure sign that a divorce may be in your cards and it’s a no win situation. When your wife starts to ask you:

“Honey, does this dress look good on me?

Head for the hills buddy, turn on the TV, watch sports and never, never ever answer that question. Never! Or get a lawyer…quick.


Knit One, Lynch Two (SDA)

Apparently knitting is now racist according to lefties….DARN!

It is a crazy lefty world out there.

Have a great Navy day.

SJ……………………………….Out

Canadian Winters

Only in Canada you say?…..

Ice fishing? Great Canadian winter pastime.

See the source imageIt’s a beautiful morning!

“Hey Hoser. A great day for ice fishin. I just caught 50 pounds of ice! Gotta get er to market by!”

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Canadian ice fishing ingenuity!

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Ice Fishin Fashionista or a Canadian hoser?

See the source imageCanadian hoser.

Canadian ice pot!

See the source image

Smokin!

Better than ice wine.  Only in Canada do people drink ice wine and smoke ice pot!

Only in Canada: bad “ice fishin” day at the lake.

See the source image


Why are Canadians in such a bad mood these days?  Oh, I don’t know:

See the source imageThe 401 in Toronto maybe?

Or could it be a Canadian winter interlude perhaps?

See the source image“I moose you sweetie” We takes what we can get.

“Come to Canada” they said.See the source image                 “You’ll love it” they said

Snow flurries in Canada!

See the source image

Enjoy the winter

See the source imageCanadian HosersSee the source imageand Hosettes


It’s ccccold out here!

A great Canadian winter song by a great Canadian band.

See. Ole Randy Bachman ‘s freezing.

 

Have a great Navy day.

 

SJ…………………………………………..Out