Category: Weirdness and Craziness

You can’t make this up!

Proud

Canada has reached an accord with China in that China will no longer conduct cyber attacks against Canadian technology and intellectual property. Yeah right!

Only in Canada can Canadian officials reach an agreement with another country that is conducting illegal, perhaps criminal activity against its sovereignty. China says they will never do it again…honest mommy.

Take a “silent time out” China. Ooooooh.

Trudeau attends church, wears Ramadan themed socks then throws it all away by attending Toronto’s “Pride” celebration.  Does anyone see the irony and hypocrisy in all of this.  Hmmmm? Hmmmm? Solution? Avoid Toronto like the plague, especially during the summer months.

A Jewish celebrant at Chicago’s Pride was told to leave because her Star of David Flag was deemed offensive. “Well, we want to be all inclusive” an organizer was heard to say.  Geesh! Solution? Stay well clear of big cities, especially in thee summer time.

“Suck on this.” Empowered nipples are the latest tool for the Trump Resistance movement to calm the nerves of those suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome. They say that it, the nipples, will remind them of the soothing, nurturing power of mommy’s milk. “Does it come in chocolate?” Someone was heard to ask?

Annual Pride festivals aka Speedo Conventions.

 

SJ – I can’t make this stuff up. Have a nice Monday!

It’s Canadian Eh?

Quebec man arrested at Michigan airport for what law enforcement officials are calling a terrorist act. How did they know this guy was a Canadian from Quebec?

During his attack he yelled:  “Alahu Akbar…eh?”

U of T held its Blacks Only Graduation ceremony recently.

“We want to be inclusive” some organizer was heard to say. Just like “Pride”, and “Black Lives Matter,” and Antifa, and on an on it goes…Geesh

Solution? Stay well clear of Universities and Colleges in major cities like Toronto. These places will self destruct soon as a result of their own narrow-mindedness and delusions of victimization.

Ten years and counting and still no sewage treatment in Victoria. Holy shit someone was heard to say. But, hey, as Canadians we’re so much better than those polluting Americans don’t you know.

“Oh you mean that country that has some of the most stringent environmental regulations on the planet. Those guys?”

Where’s “Floaty” when you need him?

 

HASBRO has gone gender neutral for all of its toys. “Mommy, can I get a G.I. She-male – zey for Christmas? Hmmm? Hmmm?

What would you rather have? A Shelby or a Prius?….Geesh

 

Thief apologizes for stealing the Yukon’s famous “Sour Toe” and sends it back. RCMP who received the package and inspected the artifact confirmed with anonymous sources that the Toe Jam and Fungus were still prevalent. Whew, not to worry.

 

Just read an article about Trudeau the First and his 1969 White Paper that called for the removal of special rights status for Natives. First Nation leaders went berserk. My question is: Shouldn’t we be taking down all references to Pierre Elliot Trudeau on our buildings, airports etc, just like Hector Langevin? No? Oh I forgot, he’s was a sunny days Liberal, Langevin was a Conservative MP.

Have a great weekend.

SJ…out

Hey, It’s Thursday

Obviously, somebody over at CTV read my post yesterday. They commissioned a poll to the tune of:

“Is bad weather more prevalent today than in the past…” or something like that. Results! – overwhelmingly…NO. Who would have thunk.

 

SJWs now complaining that there are too many white male acts at rock concerts. Well, perhaps the others…suck. Who would you rather see, hear?  The Stones, the Who, or……………??? Hmmm? Hmmmm? Can’t think of anyone right now?

 

Canadian Indigenous MP demanding that the House of Commons provide translation services in French and English such that he can use his native language in the house. If he wins this argument, and he will, because this is Canada after all, we will truly have a “House of Babel” in Canada rather than a “House of Commons.: I say just let him prat on in his native language as nobody in the house is listening anyway.  Question Period, in reality, is “Nap Time.” Trudeau and his minions have really opened a Pandora’s Box here with respect to “Indian,” no wait, “Native,” no wait, “Aboriginal,” no wait, “First Nations,” no wait, “Indigenous Peoples” yesss! Before we do anything here guys and gals lets see if we can nail the name down of the nation we’re talking about.

 

Saudi Arabia deports 15,000 camels to Quatar as part of the dispute over there. 15,000 Camels? Are you kidding me.

Heard in passing….”Every Day is Hump Day” in Quatar

 

Warren Buffet comes to the rescue of Home Capital with much needed “Cheaper” Funding. Did anyone tell Warren about the value of the Canadian Dollar. We already have cheaper funding dude!

Its a Mad, Mad, Mad World

I love black olives but when I went to get my favourite pizza joint the other day they were out of them. Same for the Tapa Bar down the street a ways.

Damn says I. Black Olives Matter, damn it, especially in a Spanish Tapa Bar and on Pizza. The world is going mad me thinks.

All levels of gov’t don’t seen to give a damn about annual deficits and debt, so why should I?

Just in…State of Illinois declares Bankruptcy. In financial crisis mode. Trudeau, Wynne take note… Not to worry….sunny, sunny days – as the “Lighthouse” song goes.

Climate Change: back in the day, oh about 30-40 years ago, no one gave two shits about the weather, except that which occurs locally. If there was a typhoon in the Philippines we never heard about it. Tornadoes in Kansas…nope. Blizzards in Saskatchewan…niet. Heat wave in Europe…nada word. I just remember watching Dave Duval, CTV Toronto chalking the weather patterns on a clear Perspex by etching highs and lows and doing so backwards, but only for our city. Now that was incredible. Or Percy Saltzman at CBC flipping his piece of chalk after a whirlwind segment of scribbling the local weather patterns and their impact on my school commute the next day. Now? Well if it shits in Chicoutime we hear about it. If it pisses in Peoria, we know about it immediately. If its howling in Hanoi, yep, right on time. If its crapping in Cambodia, we smell it right away. If its freezing in Friesland, we shudder at the thought. No wonder everyone is stressed out about the weather, and the climate. Its global and it is being shoved down our collective throats. We’re all going to die!!!!Gawd, I feel a heat wave coming on. Hey Gladys, pass me a beer sweetie.

All of you environ-mentals out there. What would you rather have? A Shelby of a Prius?? Hmmm? Hmmm? Be honest now.

 

Just Thinkin*

“Hey Jay, Howzit goin eh?”                                             

“Hey George. Long time no read.”

“Bin here Jay. What’s going on these days?”

“Pretty quiet in Cyber-land George. Craziness has toned down somewhat. Weird and Whacky as well.

The Progs are at it though. Pretty bad case of THC going on.”

“THC Jay? Is it 420 day already? Oh yeah. Right! Here’s to all the stoners out there.”

“No, no, no George. Not THC as in “Weed” but as in Trump Hysteria Condition”

“Right.  How so?”

” The Dems and Progressives want to overturn erection results! Want Electoral Colleges to renege vote for Trump in December and solidly stand upright for Hillary”

“Why Jay?”

“To save Democracy George, of course……”

“I think I need a stiff drink Jay.”

“They also want to abolish the Electoral Colleges. Something that has been a part of their electoral process, their democracy since 1776.  Seems Founding Fathers had it all wrong. They didn’t heed Nostradamus’ warning.”

“Who?”

“Nostradamus George. Nostradamus. The French Prophet and toothsayer who lived in the 1500s.”

“He did Jay? Good Gawd. How’d he end up in 1776?”

“It would appear that Nostradamus predicted Trump’s win over Hillary.”

“They state that in Quatrane 10,666 Nostradamus wrote:

 “BUCINUM Hillary verberat.

LAPSUS pergit. Bill est saevire,

Fundamentum rimas,

In furorem sine comitiis.”

“Crikey Jay, speak English!”

“Sorry George. But I did take Latin for 5 years in high school. I was…veritably good at it.”

“Here it is, as translated, it means……………………..”Hillary got Trumped in Spades”

“Seems the Founding Fathers missed that bit of sagery during their “Bridge” break while writing the Constitution.”

“And from the “Play Dough” and “Safe Space” crowd George comes this bit of THC:”

 “GOP is the most dangerous organization in History.”

“Wow, worse than the 3rd Reich? Stalin’s Communism?…..The Brady Bunch Jay?”

 

“Oh, and COP 22 is going on. Or has just finished in Marrakech

“Marrakech, as in Africa’s Marrakech Jay? I thought the Cop’s 22nd Division was in, as in Toronto.

“No, no George. Not the Police Cops but as in Community of Parties COPs – as in Climate Change.”

“Canada sent 225 delegates to the Party.” Wow. Was it BYOB Jay?”

“How’d they get there Jay? By Camel?” Or the Marrakech Express?

“No, Camels can’t swim George. No, they all flew over from Ottawa.”

“In a hot air balloon Jay?”

“Good one George.”

“Heard in passing George that Ryerson students, when interviewed recently, and when asked, felt that Canadian Peacekeepers should be deployed to the nations of Karach and Wakonda to stop the insurrections there and to thwart further production of “Vibranium” (Rebel Media, 22 Nov 16)”

“The future of mankind George. Scary! I wonder if Nostradamus predicted this in his 10,667th unfinished Quatrane: 

“Alumni idiotae”

…………………….

University Superioria

…………………….

“Something about higher learning me thinks”

 

“Y’know George. Green used to be my favourite colour. But now? I hate anything and everything green. I even killed my lawn. It is now brown in colour. And, I hate that word sustainability, transparency and I also hate that linguistic combination of two simple words… a conjunction of a perposition….”as in”!!………….STOP IT!

Shakey Jay….out!

* Pic by Wikimedia