In keeping With Justin’s trip to Davos and his presentation to the World Economic Forum:
But first Justin’s new math: New ancient Math tablet discovered. Will change everything we thought we knew about new Math.
1 + 1 = 3…Yikes
On another note: Province’s education minister calling out those parents who complain about the math program as suffering from”Mathaphobia.” “They will be dealt with” hey/zey and zir announced.
Trudeau’s Speechwriter at Davos?. “I don’t need no teleprompter.” Trudeau was heard to say!
Trudeau’s Economic Policy. Trudeau remarked: “It’s just too complicated for ordinary Canadians to understand. It all boils down to four words: F%$K the Middle Class.
Or this:
Finally, on Terrorism:
“Just like me!”
On Foreign Policy, Justin was equally profound:
“Canada’s foreign policy is all foreign to me Fare!”
Other important stuff:
Nafta and Canada. “Naf said,” McKenna, Canada’s Climate Barbie announces in her down homer accent. “Ta!, Bye, Bye.”
At a recent press conference, Justin Trudeau called U.S.-based Haitians entering Quebec “irregular” immigrants, as opposed to illegal ones, even though they are illegal.
On another note, and following Trudeau’s comments, a Canadian government official, Ahmed Hussein er Hussen, the “Minister for Illegal Immigration,” who wishes to remain anonymous, says that Keopectate will be issued to all new illegals, er irregulars. Trudeau then left for his latest round of international meetings and important discussions with foreign leaders and Heads of State.
“No Mum, this is the way to do the Macarena.”
“Hey Mutti, I just passed Ontario’s sex education program.”
Thanks for all your thoughts and cards. Appreciated it. The boys and I are doing alright.
Hard to get into it today. Buddy of mine sent me this. Thought it was great:
The difference between complete and finished. Is that like the difference between who and whom? No English dictionary has been able to adequately explain the difference between these two words.
In a recent linguistic competition held in London and attended by,
supposedly, the best in the world, Samdar Balgobin, a Guyanese man, was the clear winner with a standing ovation which lasted over 5 minutes.
The final question was: How do you explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED in a way that is easy to understand? Some people say there is no difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED.
Here is his astute answer:
When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE.
When you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED
And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED!!!
He won a trip around the world and a case of 25 year old Scotch!
Of course I wouldn’t know about that at all!
World leaders are meeting in Davos Switzerland this week to discuss many neat things…like the environment. Oxymoronic don’t you think when Al Gore et al predicted the end of blow…er snow… as a result of global warming…er climate change? Must have been a tad embarrassing arriving at Davos to see this:
“I’m sure he (Gore) said the end of blow…the representatives from Mexico and Columbia snorted. That is racist I tell you, bloody racist.”
Meanwhile
Natural disasters caused more than $300 billion in damage in 2017 and environmental dangers dominate the top risks in the Global Risks Report. Climate change will increase the risks.
No, building homes on flood plains will. Development within arid dry brush areas will. Poor forestry practices will, neglect of critical infrastructure will. Building homes in isolated areas will. 90% of forest fires are caused by humans either deliberately or indirectly….will….So there William!
Participants include: Al Gore, former U.S. Vice-President (of what?); Peter O’Neill, Prime Minister of Papua New Guinea (Who?); Philipp M. Hildebrand, Vice-Chairman, BlackRock (Who?); Hailemariam Desalegn, Prime Minister of Ethiopia (Who?); Hindou Oumarou Ibrahim, Coordinator, Association for Indigenous Women and Peoples of Chad (of Whom?) … all of whom…er who…no whom… are signatories for the implementation of the UN’s climate Change fraud…er fund. Trudeau nodded in agreement. “Hey I’ll raise you $2.5B for that fund.” “Canadians are so gullible” he whispered into an open mic.
“Yeah, but it’s Canadian dollars you know Justine….” they all laughed when they realized that important fact.
Yeah that’ll do it Al. A who’s who in the climate change world.
Will Trump crash this party?
Probably. Expect “America First,” a broadside against unfair trade practices, tough talk toward enemies and a fair bit of bragging when U.S. President Donald Trump speaks at the World Economic Forum (WTF?) next week, according to a range of policy commentators.
You know, standing up for what is right about one’s own country. Just like Germany, France and the Swiss do. America first?
“No bloody way Mutti Merkel touts. It’s isolationist, racist I tell you. How dare you look out for your constituents. Zat iz not the European vay”
Interesting that Switzerland has been ranked as the best country in the world in which to live…two years running. “Oh, are they part of the EU financial and cultural basket case? No? No? Can there be a correlation here? Mutti was asked.
“No, no, no ….just move vight along.” she responded.
Meanwhile Trudeau, not to be outdone by Trump, assured the audience at Davos that while Trump acts like the big bad bully he is Canada remains steadfast as a beacon of light and hope in an ever increasing dangerous world. Just look at me folks:
See, even these people agree. Are they laughing at Trump or Trudeau’s new sweater:
Too much craziness out there.
Hey I see Canada is now ranked #2 of the best countries in the world in which to live. Switzerland is #1. Nutella beat out Maple Syrup for the second year in a row………..sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!
This just in: A dozen beasts have been disqualified from this year’s Saudi “camel beauty contest” because their handlers used Botox to make them more handsome….I kid you not!
This latest scandal coming in on the heels of the 2017 Muslim Beauty pageant.
During the Burka swimsuit competition the judges were heard to remark. “This was truly a huge challenge as no clear winner emerged.”
Hump day in Saudi Arabia takes on a whole new meaning.
Today’s “Oxymoronic Award” goes to:
At Davos, Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi called for greater international cooperation on issues such as climate change and cited the rise of protectionism as a threat facing the world, presenting a vision at odds with U.S. President Donald Trump’s “America First” approach.
Why do we even listen to these guys anymore?
Oh and the latest Darwin award goes to our new generation of kids:
“YouTube and Facebook are trying to stop the spread of the Tide Pod Challenge, a bizarre and dangerous online craze where teenagers eat laundry detergent packets on camera.”
Heard in passing:
“Gawd, when I was a kid we were so poor that I had to eat my tide right out of the box.”
“Oh yeah? Not me. We were soooo poor when I was a kid that my mom washed my mouth out with a used bar of soap each and every day! So there……….!”
Tune of the day:
I don’t know. Is a Sultan a Muslim elder or a Burka swimsuit competition judge, or what? I just don’t know but this song rocks.
Few new posts for awhile. Family emergency. Here is a repeat from last year. Still relevant:
From the “World Health Organization”……………………Who?
We want to tax sugar to fight obesity… SWEEEEEEET!
From the school of common sense: get them off their asses and into the playgrounds, sports programs, and throw their Xboxes, IPhones and Tablets into the trash. Bring back play, as the saying goes.
But it’s their right to do what they want. Right?
Kids have no responsibilities therefore they have no rights!
And what about rights. Do you think you have rights? What rights? Think again man or women or ne,ve,ze. This is just a smoke screen and another example of how our individual freedoms and rights are being undermined by government legislators – at all levels. Soon we will be told what to eat, what to drink, what to wear, what to say, what to think, what to watch, what to drive, what bloody light bulbs we have to use.
Legislators will ban herbicides, ban pesticides, ban perfume, ban cologne, ban lawnmowers, ban red meat, ban white meat for its privilege, ban “Monster Truck” shows, ban camping, ban boating, ban contact sports, ban BBQ’s, ban fun. If left unchecked there will be no idling of cars, hey, no driving of cars, no international air travel, no travel at all, no smoking, no swearing, no drinking, no critical thought if you please, no consequences for bad personal decisions or choices, no discipline as it’s always somebody else’s fault. The do good-ers and the activists are having a field day. By the way, have you ever met a happy activist or a happy environ-mental -ist? Nope? Neither have I.
It took me 65 years to become a Grumpy Old Man. These environmental whackos and Social Justice Warriors had that locked up the minute they entered University.
Orwell had it right all along. Only he was well ahead of our times. Oh the horror of it all. People – wake up!!!
Next they’ll want to tax the very air that we breathe. Oh wait, they’re doing that now with their so called Carbon Tax. After all when we inhale we have to exhale, and that my friends contains CO2 – so stop breathing to save the planet. In today’s world telling someone figuratively to “drop dead” has a whole new meaning…THEY MEAN IT!
They’ll want to tax volcanic eruptions and erections next.
And given the UN’s stellar record of collective security and peacekeeping – Rwanda, Sudan, Somalia – come to mind; their impressive decisions on Human Rights as reflected by the righteousness of the UN Human Rights Council; the inspirational insight that the UN demonstrated with their election of Zimbabwe as the lead nation on the United Nations’ Commission on Sustainable Development, their appointment of Iran to head the committee on the status of women and Libya to chair the Human Rights Council a few years back; and their dynamic organizational skills and efficacy in financial administration as witnessed by their Oil for Food program and the human disaster that is called Haiti, why oh why on earth would anyone with half a brain in their head believe in the conclusions drawn up by the UN’s Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. Huh? Huh?
Maldives – 32 days and counting, Hey I am just following the UN’s dire prediction from 1988. Everyone believes the UN right?
Let’s hope there is a lot of air in that tank. You’ll need it!
Draining the swamp of swampy, swarmy critters. Matt Lauer is now gone. Why? Sexual misconduct allegations. It’s a foreskin conclusion, er, foregone conclusion, a senior staff’s member remarked. We do not put up for this kind of conduct. Meanwhile:
Fallon’s late night ratings dropping like a stone. Colbert passing him. Why? Colbert and others hate Trump and regularly lampoon him on their show. The audience loves it. Then again their target audience captures those dudes in the 18-49 year old age group who are basement dwellers, suck on their parents teats and who are unemployed. The real audience, the one that really matters, is not watching these shows because they are usually asleep getting sufficient rest prior to next days hard working grind. Besides, I don’t know about you but I do not find Colbert funny at all. No sense of humour. Take away the laugh track and there would be dead silence.
See, even these guys are happy that the Argos won the Coupe de Gris / Grey Cup
These people? Not so much.
Wahhhhh. Calgary Lost?? Wahhhhhhhh. Say it ain’t so Bo!
The hidden meaning behind Harry’s hand gesture.
“Gawd Meghan. Those Tacos are not sitting well.” While the senior royal men look like this with their hands behind their backs:
“Ooooo, that was a good one Harry. Warning next time please.”
Slow day today. Happy Wednesday. Or for those of you living in Qatar: Happy Hump Day!
Whew! It’s still there. Thought for a minutes the UN was right to predict the Maldives would be underwater by Jan 1 2018. Nope, still there with 33 days to go.
From a post last year. Sorry, posts will be down as I am dealing with a sickness in the family:
Don’t you know:
Climate change is a feminist movement. Why, because it’s always changing man…..;
Carbon is a transgendered element of the Periodic Table. It is stuck between that borion “B” and that nitrogen-der;
Cow farts and flatulence contributes to Global Warming and is therefore a masculine threat. Why? Because women never, ever fart. And if they do their farts never stink. It must be stamped out immediately. See #1 above;
The other day an activist told me that Archimedes worked for big oil. This was in response to a discussion I had with him that he needn’t worry about major flooding and sea level rising if the Arctic Ice Cap melts
Eureka! The Arctic Ice Cap is not melting. It’s expanding. It must be a feminist movement as well. “Am I getting bigger. Do I look fat to you honey?;”
Global Warming causes hot summer weather;
Global Warming causes cold, frigid winter weather;
Frigidity is a feminist movement and must be stamped out at all costs;
Global cooling is therefore, a feminist threat, and must be met with #3 above;
Under peer review, as temperatures rise the warming effects of global warming will offset the cooling effects of global cooling as a result of the global warming. Got that? Yeah? cool! Chill man, er woman, er ne, ve or ze, er wo…oops…man
Pesticides found in Marijuana! Ban marijuana now before it kills us;
Pot for kids! Ban pot now because you can’t call the kettle back;
Under the new marijuana legislation, every pot has a lid man, er women, er ne,ve or ze!;
Heaven help us if the kids are our future…see #12 above;
Hooray for natural gas…see #3 above.
Liquid natural gas? Well a good dose of Keopectate will take care of that;
Greenpeace and US activists protest First Nation sponsored aqua-culture…What?;
Ne, Ve or Ze are Clockwork Oranges.
Smoking kills but smoking pot is alright now man. It’s out of sight, out of mind, and out of body; and
Thank God that I will be dead soon…see #s 19,14 and 12 above.
![The 3,700-year-old Babylonian tablet Plimpton 322 at the Rare Book and Manuscript Library at Columbia University in New York.]({"default":"//img-s-msn-com.akamaized.net/tenant/amp/entityid/AAqG4RX.img?h=373&w=624&m=6&q=60&o=f&l=f&x=636&y=294"} "The 3,700-year-old Babylonian tablet Plimpton 322 at the Rare Book and Manuscript Library at Columbi... - UNSW/Andrew Kelly")
Trudeau’s Economic Policy. Trudeau remarked: “It’s just too complicated for ordinary Canadians to understand. It all boils down to four words: F%$K the Middle Class.
“Just like me!”
“No Mum, this is the way to do the Macarena.”
Let’s hope there is a lot of air in that tank. You’ll need it!
See, even these guys are happy that the Argos won the Coupe de Gris / Grey Cup
Wahhhhh. Calgary Lost?? Wahhhhhhhh. Say it ain’t so Bo!![a man in a suit and tie standing next to a fence]({"default":"//img-s-msn-com.akamaized.net/tenant/amp/entityid/BBFSKRv.img?h=373&w=624&m=6&q=60&o=f&l=f"} "Provided by Hearst Communications, Inc")
