Category: A Very Short Story

This is nice:

Birju Dattani, former executive director of the Yukon Human Rights Commission, was appointed chief commissioner in June and is to take up the role in August for a salary of between $330,000 and $390,000…Wow. I am a Human Rights expert and you’re not.

After his appointment was announced, Jewish organizations raised concerns about the screening process and posts he had made about Israel while he was attending graduate school under a different name almost a decade ago. Well, it is a human right, right? 

Following those concerns Justice Minister Alf Virani’s office announced it would do an independent investigation of Dattani’s “potentially troubling” statements before he starts the new position. Alf Virani?? The blind leading the blind?

I am Alf Virani…and you’re not.

A spokesman for the Privy Council Office (PCO), which is responsible for vetting appointments, now says there was an “administrative oversight” during the vetting process before Dattani’s appointment. Yeah, right. Administrative oversight is Ottawa code for we really fooked things up.

Daniel Savoie says Dattani’s other name was not searched or given to the security agencies also involved in background checks. Other name? Other names, aliases? Are you kidding me? Oh, yeah, obfuscation is a human right in Canada, don’t ya know.

The RCMP and CSIS are “now completing the necessary reviews.” But Dattani was not fired.

“(The PCO) has undertaken a review of its background check process in this case and has issued direction, as part of its standard operating procedures, that all aliases provided should be reviewed and shared with partners for review,” Savoie said. Whew! That should do it.

“Yup, 10-12 Submarines. You betcha, by golly, gee willickers. And unlike our last buy these subs will actually be able to submerge. You have my word on that because I am Bill Blair and you’re not.”

Defence Minister Bill Blair inflated numbers on military spending, says a Budget Office report. It follows Department of National Defence in-house polling that found half of Canadians believe the military is underfunded: “Do you feel Canada’s military is underfunded, overfunded or receives about the right amount?” Well do you??” Trudough wants to know. More obfuscation.

Canadian defence? It is an oxymoron. When the rest of the world spells defense with an “s” Canada spells it with a “c.” Further obfuscation.

How fooked is Canada’s defence organization? Well back in the late 80s Canada built 12 Maritime Coastal Defence Vessels. They are supposed to defend our coasts from smugglers, polluters etc. But they can only do 15 knots, max. Boston Whalers can go faster. So the would be smugglers give these vessels the finger as they speed off over the horizon. “Yeah but they look good,”: Bill Blair says, “and that is a deterrent.” Yes, the pirates are shaking in their boots over that statement.

Canada just built 2 Arctic offshore patrol vessels, and sent one of them to Cuba to deter the Russian naval presence there. Does anyone see the logic in that? Last time I checked there were no ice floes in the Caribbean.

The Canadians are coming…the Canadians are coming, the Russian Admiral lamented.

“Yeah but we have a 50 caliber gun.”

“Ottawa. We have a problem.” So says the Canadian On Scene Commander in Havana Harbour.

The Canadian Navy is a joke.

Best Health Care System in the world??

The NDP and Liberal solution? We need more administrators with higher salaries that should be paid for by higher taxes on primary health care providers. Easy peasy. Yeah, that should do it. That should do it. We want moe money.

Thank goodness for that. I guess Freelunch in now our health minister, and you’re not.

We want moe money. And in 30 years time, when this is totally fooked up we will demand moe money because the Government should have known better and never have turned over the reins of this program to incompetent indigenous agencies. Moe money. Moe money. The benefit that just keeps on giving.

AFN’s draft child-welfare reform deal with Ottawa reportedly worth $47.8B

The head of the Assembly of First Nations has informed chiefs that a draft deal with Ottawa on child-welfare reforms is worth $47.8 billion, a source who was in the room says — more than double what was initially promised.

Great if you can get it…and I can’t.