Category: A Very Short Story

From the Short Story Vault

Spirits in the Sky

Sorry for the delay. Server problems again. Hey, crap happens:

Given that an election is coming up soon in Canada, here is a little take on the famous Abbot and Costello skit: Who’s on First. A repeat worth repeating:

COSTELLO:    I want to talk about the unemployment rate in Canada

ABBOTT:        Good Subject.  Terrible Times.  It’s 5.6%.

COSTELLO:    That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT:         No, that’s 23%.

COSTELLO:    You just said 5.6%.

ABBOTT:         5.6% Unemployed.

COSTELLO:    Right, 5.6% out of work.

ABBOTT:         No, that’s 23%.

COSTELLO:    Okay, so it’s 23% unemployed.

ABBOTT:         No, that’s 5.6%.

COSTELLO:    WAIT A MINUTE.  Is it 5.6% or 23%?

 ABBOTT:        5.6% are unemployed.  23% are out of work.

 COSTELLO:    If you are out of work you are unemployed

ABBOTT:        No, Trudeau said you can’t count the “Out of Work”  as the
unemployed. You have to look for work to be unemployed.

COSTELLO:   BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

ABBOTT:        No, you miss his point.

COSTELLO:   What point?

ABBOTT:        Someone who doesn’t look for work can’t be counted with
those who look for work.  It wouldn’t be fair.

COSTELLO:    To whom?

ABBOTT:        The unemployed.

COSTELLO:    But ALL of them are out of work.

ABBOTT:        No, the unemployed are actively looking for work.  Those who
are out of work gave up looking and if you give up, you are no longer in the ranks of the unemployed.

COSTELLO:   So if you’re off the unemployment roles that would count as less unemployment?

ABBOTT:        Unemployment would go down.  Absolutely!

COSTELLO:   The unemployment just goes down because you don’t look for
work?

ABBOTT:        Absolutely it goes down.  That’s how it gets to 5.6%. Otherwise it would be 23%.

COSTELLO:    Wait, I got a question for you  That means there are two ways
to bring down the unemployment number?

ABBOTT:        Two ways is correct.

COSTELLO:    Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

ABBOTT:        Correct.

COSTELLO:    And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for a job?

ABBOTT:        Bingo.

COSTELLO:   So there are two ways to bring unemployment down,  and the
easier of the two is to have people stop looking for work.

ABBOTT:       Now you’re thinking like a Liberal.

COSTELLO:   I don’t even know what the hell I just said!

ABBOTT:       Now you’re thinking like Trudeau

And more election fodder to think about:

file:///C:/Users/John/AppData/Local/Microsoft/Windows/INetCache/IE/SIS33M8W/WebPage.pdf

A good read.

How is a 4 cents a liter, 10 cents, 50 cents, a dollar a litre tax going to stop climate change? It can’t and it will not. It will only fill the coffers of the Federal and Provincial Governments and make us poorer for it.

Why is it that when a total eclipse of the sun occurs, which happened in our area in Sep 2017, the ambient temp fell by 10 degrees – when the “so called” experts say that the sun has nothing to do with our climate?

Why do our politicians keep referring to CO2 as a poison when clearly it is essential for all life on earth?

Saying that we can save the planet and mitigate the climate is like saying that we can prevent another solar eclipse; or that we can somehow change the geographical contours of the Grand Canyon. Such is the arrogance of our political parties.

Wake up Canadians to this huge fraud.

Love this song. A psychedelic Christian song that was written and performed by an orthodox Jew…1969.

Have a great day.

SJ……….…………………………………..Out

Stuff For A Thursday

I just received my tax return assessment. It ain’t pretty:

Got that right.

CRA (Canada’s tax agency) always tries to make you feel good when they’re screwing you or ripping you off:

Those pencil necks.

“Meghan Markle’s dress after the birth of her new baby shocked me” so says some fashionable fashionista. No this shocked me as she goes on to say:

“Wearing white is downright brave. The days and weeks after having a baby are basically equivalent to the heaviest period of your life. In the first week postpartum, the bleeding is so heavy that most women usually wear thick padded pairs of disposable mesh underwear they give you in the hospital, because the bleeding is so intense that you would ruin any underwear you personally own.”

Something I really do not need to know.

And with Harry, the fashionista continues:

“Harry looked as proud as punch to be wearing the black sports top, which also had the Invictus Games logo stitched on it. It spelt out “I am Daddy” in yellow. Aw shucks!”

Meghan looked as proud as a punch buggy as she said: “I am mommy” in red.  Aw yucks.

And this is news why? 

Amanda Knox is returning to Italy for a crimes conference. The title of her presentation is: “Stupid Is As Stupid Does.” It is expected that she will have an extended vacation there once her presentation is over.

Rhetoric between two of Canada’s top politicians. Doug Ford, Premier of Ontario and John Tory, Mayor of Canada’s largest city:

a person wearing a suit and tie: Tijana Martin/Canadian Press“Oh yeah? Yeah. Oh yeah? Yeah. Oh yeah? Yeah. Oh yeah? yeah” and on and on it goes. Take that…Kapow!

Summer ‘s here already with 26 degree C temps in Victoria.

Victoria lawn furniture…by Ford.

See the source imageSee the source imageSomewhere in Langford, or the Western Communities, Greater Victoria.

Meanwhile, in the Netherlands. Backyard furniture by Heineken:

Translation: C’mon in, the beer is fine.

Me and my girlfriend tried “Hello Fresh” for one week and this is how we look now:

See the source image

Slide 1 of 15: Relationship coach, motivational speaker and bestselling author Grace Cirocco says one of the biggest indicators that a partner may be tempted to cheat (if they aren’t already) has to do with distancing. “If your partner is spending less and less time with you," it could be a major red flag, notes Cirocco. "If your partner is making excuses not to be alone with you… In my experience, there is a distancing that happens for one person.” Don’t ignore these signs that you may need marriage help – before it’s too late.15 signs your partner may be cheating on you.

“C’mon Susan, I didn’t really mean what I said.” George pleaded.

“My name ‘s Charlene Chris”

Sometimes, as the world gets crazier by the minute, one could only wish for that asteroid’s deep impact:

Child abuse.

I see dead trees and CO2

The Greenies and the UN’s IPCC are getting desperate now for one world government. See asteroid above. Target? UN Headquarters in New York City…oh, and Stockholm Sweden.

New York University students want free college for all. “So we can Partay, Partay, Partay…then become like that girl like above like, I like her.”

“Like, we are like brainwashed and like we are like enjoying it”one Univershity (sic) of Hawaii stated as he was driving down the LikeLike Highway in Honolulu (see pencil neck video above).

Elizabeth May, Canada’s Green Party Leader of one…er now two…,is all excited as this new Green MP who recently won a By-Erection in Nanaimo BC.

“This win is a wakeup call for all Canadians.” she said categorically. “We have to destroy our economy right now to fight climate change and save the planet from ourselves.” as the new MP took his seat among the other 307 members, one of which is Elizabeth May.

Er from who Liz?

I prefer mine cooked:

Mongolian couple die of plague after eating raw Marmot.

Thanks to Maggie’s Farm

I am a veteran and proud of it. Yet Canada’s – Trudeau’s treatment of Admiral Norman, Canada’s second highest military man who was going to be charged with breach of trust (now dropped) is disgusting. I do believe many Canadians of millennial age, especially those who reside in British Columbia and Ontario (I said most, not all) do not have a clue. Sad state of Canadian affairs:

Obviously a Country and Western singer. True blue Americans – the so called deplorables – and Canadians. A brother and sister…hood that I am proud to be a part of. Thanks Mark and Mike and Dottie.

My take on a very famous Canadian WW1 battle. Vimy Ridge the battle that made Canadians proud.

The Ridge

Reflection’s wise. Its true insight flies

Throughout our minds yet forever binds us

To eternal life that is devoid of strife.

Just peaceful thoughts, not restless, nor caught

Into that web of war to tread,

Not normalcy! Pure madness bred our way to be.

Yet as one we brand an ancestral land

As our spirits rise to embrace God’s sky

And shed away our fears.

–

Our thoughts of home as our mothers roam

Among our graves, their faces brave

To the sadness here of men with fear

Yet for our nation’s prayers we died out there.

For a home sweet home, dear Canada

That knowledge bears a passion… flares

Within our hearts, to love; to shove

Our fears aside and run in stride

To get away from there.

–

Over top we’d go in whistled throes

That plundered us within gun sight foes.

Such madness…crushed, our brothers flush

With abject fear with those guns so near.

We’d pray in silence for our leader’s guidance

For in them we trust and as Canucks we thrust

So far ahead though we walked with dread.

With the barrage we shudder, our blanket cover

Dear God we’re scared.

–

The earth it shakes… please mothers take us

Into your arms and away from harm.

We’d fall in silence…there’s no pride in violence

We looked ahead for behind ’s our dead.

Their faces seared, no longer feared

Just a darkness now with thoughts that bow

To a light that’s gone, forever done.

For now it seems our passion stream

Is ebbing some for our time has come.

–

We fought for glory, each life a story

With silent breath we faced cruel death.

Our youthful brash ‘gainst madness, crashed

Into the mud, the cold, the blood.

That Ridge has been a horror scene.

A Ridge that bears our lives and shares

Blood curdling chills, then silence… killed.

And down we go with our cries now still

Just silent prayers to loved ones shared…so far from there.

–

The death knell rings for our lives and brings

A peace you share from that Ridge out there.

Is a peace we paved to our silent graves

With a peace we share in God’s love’s lair.

We were men of arms, a brotherhood

And beyond that Ridge, your nationhood.

With souls set free our spirits now see

Just peaceful lands and a national brand…your nation‘s free!

 

Yet horrendous loss this madness cost…Canadians!

–

Please…remember us

 

SJ……….………….Out

Pass the Joint Gladys

Slide 18 of 21: Williams Lake is a town of just over 10,600 in the central Interior of British Columbia. According to Maclean’s, the town has the highest per capita crime rate in the province. It’s ranked fourth in violent crime, third in sexual assaults, third in robbery, and fifth in cocaine trafficking crimes.In 2016, a gang-related shooting forced two area schools to close for the day. Local Indigenous leaders told the Globe and Mail shortly after the shooting that gang violence and the desperation caused by poverty had brought about an escalating crime problem. Although rates of drug-related crimes remained high in 2016, according to the Maclean’s analysis, rates of youth crime, assault, gun crime, robbery, and breaking and entering have all fallen.

What do Chilliwack, Port Alberni, Dawson Creek, Penticton, Terrace, Vernon, Prince George, Langley, William’s Lake British  Columbia- all have in common? They are part of the most dangerous places in Canada to live. All in the top 20. William’s Lake is rated number 4. So, 9 cities in British Columbia are rated in the top 20 of the most violent cities in Canada in which to live. Much of it due to poverty. And it is going to get worse given the government’s plan to stop or curtail all resource development in the Province.

“I have a dream,” the Premier said. “A Barista with a joint on every street corner of every city in this Province. Minimum wage for everybody. Every day will be 420 daze.” It must be the water man, and the stale air that we breathe. Second hand weed.

And in another Canadian City near you. The heads of Unifor and General Motors Canada are set to make an announcement this morning about the future of operations in Oshawa, Ont.

The General Motors assembly plant in Oshawa

“We have a dream.” they began “that there will be Baristas and a joint on evry street corner of this city, of this great city of Oshawa.”

See the source image“No, no, no.”, the Turd spoke. “I have the best dream of all. No more pipelines in this country for there will be a Barista and a joint on every street corner of every city of this great country of our. Yes I have a dream.”

And it’s an economic nightmare.

“Just livin the dream man, livin the dream.”

See the source image“Turn off the turd’s mind before it explodes. No wait…..”

Meghan and Harry have a new baby boy…named Sussex. My only comment. Who names their baby Sussex anyway. Sussex? That is a place, a county, a region of England as in the “Earl of Sussex.” It is also an area of Southern Ontario. Sussex? They grow Tomatoes there – and Heinz pickles and weed man. They must have had a Barista and a joint before naming that kid.

Poor kid.

Oh this is cute:

It’s always been a hot topic (oh really): LNG in Canada and B.C. but one First Nations organization says there is a lot of misinformation when it comes to Indigenous support during a Prince George panel visit today (March. 14)…oh really?

The First Nation LNG Alliance Society is a merging collective of First Nations that are associated with Coastal GasLink while also promoting the positives that could come out of such a project…positives? Really?

The Coastal GasLink project is roughly 670 km of pipeline that would deliver natural gas from the Dawson Creek area to a proposed LNG Canada facility located near Kitimat, B.C.

“We now have the opportunity to deliver our natural resources to tidewater which has been a challenge of B.C. and Canada in the past,” No? Really? former chief of McLeod Indian Band Derk Orr says. “In order to do that, it helps provide us with more dollars for our communities to build hospitals, community development and a number of areas.”

“Oh really! Pass the joint Gladys. A feel a barista coming on.”

Kate steps out in red, hours after baby Sussex photos. And this is news….why?

Denver Colorado says no to “magic mushrooms.” Expect a move to British Columbia cities soon.

“Pass the mushrooms Gladys. I’m feeling a bit peckish after that barista and joint.

After the Green’s By-Election win in Nanaimo where they arrogantly state that fighting climate change is Canada’s #1 priority comes this little nugget of news:

Poll: Do you agree with the call for Canada to cut its greenhouse gas emissions in half by 2030?

  • No (85%, 474 Votes)
  • Yes (15%, 86 Votes)

Total Voters: 560

The air was thick at the Green’s Party Headquarters after that bit of news. Baristas were flowing, the joints were rolling and the magic mushrooms growing among the green delegates.

Global warming cockus (sic) meeting in France, May 2019.

Bring it on. Arctic blast envelops much of Europe. Hey, but that’s only weather man. We’re talking climate here.

Colorado Rocky Mountain High

Pass that joint Gladys.

Have a great day.

SJ……….………………………….Out

Fossil Fools

Green Party of Canada won the Nanaimo By-Election. Party claims that voters want immediate action of Climate Change. Not true. The Green Party of 2 wants immediate action on Climate Change.

Vote Green? Destroy the Canadian economy. That is the Green Party’s message to Canadians after the Green Party By-Election win in Nanaimo. If you thought gas prices are bad now stand by for heavy rolling if the Greens ever won federally. Oh, and don’t get sick.

Climate Change or Global Warming has now become a religion. No amount of factual evidence to the contrary will ever change the minds of these zealots. We are doomed if we let them have their way. Progressive thought and policies will destroy our way of life…if you let them.

Climate Change is not the #1 priority of Canadians. It is with the Greenies though and they want to destroy our way of life.

Of course this is the lefty elite’s view of the world.

Good God, we need a famine!

This is cute:

REGINA — Canada’s Minister for Public Safety Ralph Goodale, an oxymoron, says right-wing, white supremacists and neo-Nazi groups, liberal code for Conservatives, are an increasing concern and threat to Canadians.

Goodale says the federal government is working with Internet providers to eliminate the issue. Ban free speech for all conservative thinkers.

This coming from the same folks who gave Omar Khadr, a convicted terrorist, $10,500,000 taxpayer dollars and an apology.

This coming from a government that just removed Sikh and Muslim Sunni / Shi-ite from the Canadian terrorist lexicon. Just a wee reminder Ralph:

See the source imageShame on Canada!

Progressive policies result in this:

Coming to a Canadian city near you. Vancouver? Victoria? Left coast progressiveness? Now this is a crisis. Not climate change.

More progressive thought: Well my wife, @Jsoosty has been suspended by @Twitter because she pointed out some basic facts to a silly 19 year old boy. People with penises are male, they can’t be lesbians.  That’s the truth, ban me if you wish, I wouldn’t want to stay in any club that threw my darling out.

Heard in passing: “Hey, I’m just a lesbian trapped in a man’s body!”

Everything the progressives touch they destroy. Venezuela comes to mind as a progressive model of economic destruction.

Modern Canadian journalism, especially the CBC, is all about deciding what facts the Canadian people should know as it might reflect badly on the Liberal Party of Canada.

Metropolis was made in 1927. As a society, progressive thought would have us move in this direction:

More and more tourists are falling to their deaths in the Grand Canyon. Solution? Ban the Grand Canyon. Hey, if we think we can change the climate well, heck, banning or eliminating this geological marvel should be a walk in the park.

With respect to like climate change kids who are like, on the march like:

Well, Warmist parents, go for it. And don’t forget to stop giving the kids rides in fossil fueled vehicles. They can walk or ride a bike. Heck, non-Warmist parents of Warmist children should do stuff like this, show the kids just what ‘climate change’ policies bring. Limit their ability to re-charge their smartphones and tablets to two days a week, because energy will be really, really expensive, plus all the brownouts and blackouts, thanks to ‘climate change’ policies. Limit their shower time. Start “taxing” their allowances. There really are so many ways to make it personal in showing kids what their beliefs will bring.

C’mon climate change proponents. Get out of your SUVs now and lead by example (see video above). No more talk. Action is required…NOW!

If only Canada had balls: Hamas launched a cyberattack during rocket barrage, so Israel blew up their cyber command center.

A different time. When governments and men had balls – women too.

Have a nice day.

 

SJ………….Out

 

 

 

Time Is On My Side…Not

This is cute. According to the Liberals and Maclean’s magazine Conservatives are white supremacists. Why? Because they support legal migration, are defenders of jobs in the energy sector and believe in our national sovereignty whereas the Liberals usually equate to wide spread corruption. Only the greatest Prime Ministers of Canada come from Quebec touted Trudeau a few years back. And all of our major scandals over the past few years come from those Prime Minister’s.  Adscam (Chretien/Martin), Lavscam (Trudeau) and Airbus (Mulroney). Quebecers or those Prime Ministers cannot help it for it is inbred within their DNA. There is corruption at every level of government in this province. And that is why I will never vote for any candidate of any party who hails from Quebec, ever again. Then again I’ll be dead soon anyway so it will not matter in my case.

If you thought that the “Family Compact” disappeared after the rebellions of 1837 think again. Canada has been governed by a form of this compact ever since. Consider this in our current government:

  • Cabinet                                                Left
  • Liberal Cockus(sic)                        Left
  • Judiciary                                             Left
  • Press                                                     Left
  • Academia                                            Left
  • Cultural                                               Left
I picked this breaking news story up on a local community services radio station;  just thought I would share it:
 
The  Regina (Saskatchewan) Police Service report finding a man’s body in the Wascana Creek, near the RCMP grounds.  The dead  man’s name will not be released until his family has been notified.
 
The  victim apparently drowned due to excessive marijuana consumption. He was  wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt, a pink G-string, a strap-on dildo, purple lipstick, and a ‘Trudeau for PM’ T-shirt.  He also had a cucumber in his rectum.
 
The  police removed the Trudeau T-shirt to spare his family any
Unnecessary  embarrassment.
 
In spite  of what we sometimes think, the Police do care.
 

Ryerson student feels taken advantage of because she has to pay rent on her accommodations. Poor thing, she thought it was free.

a woman standing in a kitchen: Kelda Yuen/ CBCHey, but you have stainless!

The Trudeau (and BC) government’s war against the oil and gas sector, resulting in thousand and thousands of shuttered businesses and laid off workers have had some serious unintended consequences for the Federal and Provincial coffers.

The loss of tax revenue

Who would have thunk it?

“When Calls the Heart” a very popular series on TV. I haven’t seen it but what the hell does “when calls the heart” mean anyway. Is that like “This is Us?” Well no it ain’t.

Bill Wyman, founding member of the Rolling Stones, married an 18 year old when he was 52. He first met her when she was 14. “I was stupid” said the rocker. “I should have known it would never work. She was way tooo young.” and you were wayyyyyy too old you old perv. Marriage fell apart after 2 years.

But boomers still want to see an aging rocker, rock. eh Mick?

“I see dead people. No, oops sorry, I see CO2 and I see dead trees.” This coming from some 16 year old climate change darling from Sweden who is sparking civil unrest in the UK and around the world.

“I see someone who is nuts.” Her parents should be charged with child abuse!

An alternate way to travel through Switzerland. But what about going uphill?

Fitting tribute to Bill Wyman and the Rolling Stones. Bill is the bass player.

Aahh, no it isn’t Mick.

Have a great day.

SJ……….…………………Out