Category: A Very Short Story

From the Short Story Vault

Nauseating Stuff

Sorry….server was down for two days.

Have you ever wondered why so many sick people go to health food stores? Hmmm?

My wife was checking out at a grocery counter the other day when the cashier told her that she had to have her own packing bags as they no longer gave out plastic bags for groceries to save the planet. She said this as she was packing hamburger wrapped in plastic; chicken wrapped in plastic, cleaning stuff wrapped in plastic; confectionaries wrapped in plastic and small toys wrapped in so much plastic that one needed a chain saw to open it…Geesh.

The planet doesn’t need saving. We need to be saved by idiots like this!

The other night I went out and ordered an Organic Pizza. It was green!!!

President of France…Malcron…says that terrorism is cause by Climate Change. I kid you not. No wonder Trump saw fit to remove America from this madness. I only wish that PM Trudope had the gonads, i.e., balls, to save Canada from these idiots and get us out of this accord as well. Oh, wait a minute, PM Trudope is a feminist therefore…no balls.

Majority of Canadians (71%) are outraged that Trudope agreed to a $10.5M payout to Khadr, the guy who killed an American medic in Afghanistan. But then again, the great unwashed, us, don’t really have the intellect to understand the really big “Picture.” that Trudope does.  Just another selfie huh Justinian?

Hey, I am going to start walking now and get into shape because I have just bought a $200 Pedometer…yesss!….Geeesh!

In the US military Transgendered Men must now be given “dignity and respect” while in Women’s showers…no, they don’t want dignity and respect they want to get laid…are you kidding me??

South Australia experiencing major electrical blackouts due to their intent to rely solely on solar and wind for their electricity needs. “Its sad” someone was heard to say “as Australia has a lot of gas”…..I know…I know….Ottawa does too. Same with France…see Malcron above.

My Quote of the Week……They say that “Humour is good for the heart; laughter is good for the soul….Perhaps, but giggling drives me nuts.”

And who are they anyway???

 

That is all for today

SJ out.

Cheque’s in the Mail

Khadr got his $10.5Ms buck from the Feds pretty quickly. Asked about his case from reporters Khadr said he couldn’t comment because it was before the courts. Turns out he already cashed the cheque. Gawd, if only the Feds treated the military vets the same way instead of: “Be patient”

If this incident is truly our fault then fire the bastard(s) who made this international faux-pas of a human rights abuse. Then again when did murder and terrorism become a fundamental in the war on human rights?

A while back I came through the Vancouver Airport and was amazed, dismayed at the lack of Canadianna anywhere displayed. It was all First Nation…oops…Indigenous People’s art. Now, it is beautiful and striking but is that all there is to our country? Is Trudeau right when he says that there are no Canadian core values, culture? What about the Bannisters great 4 minute mile run during the Commonwealth Games in 1954. Or the Japanese Canadian contribution to the fishery. BC’s war effort, colonization efforts, Trans-Canada Railroad, Chinese contribution? and on and on it goes. There are many things to be proud of in this Province. Not just First Nations. Of course if one complains there are immediately branded a racist. Sad.

I want my country back.

Is the History Channel about history or about American / Canadian Pickers, Forged in Fire, Pawn Shop. Where is the history in all of that. CNN now #10 in list of broadcasters in the US. That high up? Wow. Where is Christianne Amanpour when you need her? You know that highly over rated female journalist. Like Bawbwa Wawlters!

 

Short today: have a great weekend…..SJ…Out.

It’s All Over But the Cleanup

Finally over. Canada Day and the 4th of July. Hope everyone had a great time. Back to normal.

Canada Day celebrations in Ottawa were a fiasco, a bust, a disaster. Typical bureaucratic cluster F$$k. Anything to say Ms Joli? Having worked in Ottawa for many years I know exactly how all of this transpired. Too many chiefs and not enough Indians, oops sorry, Natives, oops sorry, Aboriginals, oops sorry, First Nations, oops sorry, Indigenous Peoples. You get my drift. I mean how could we ever organize an event such as this when we can’t even get the name of the Indigenous People right. Garbage detail had quite the cleanup on the hill. Now if only thet could clean up the other waste up there.

Only in Canada do we compensate a terrorist by giving him $10.5 Million Dollars and an official gov’t apology. My sincere condolences to the Sheer family. We are not all as anal as our flake of a Prime Minister. He doesn’t speak for me or my wife. If I was Ms Sheer I would go after his settlement.

Have a nice day….SJ out.

I Hate Tuesdays

UN condemns Israel yet again for human rights,, war crimes etc. Who at the UN you may ask? Syria, Iran, Kuwait, North Korea, All of the Middle East countries and on an on it goes. A who’s who in the world’s Human Rights violation Rogues Gallery.

Are we still a member of this thing.

Islamophobia is considered now to be a hate crime in Canada.

So say the El Qud celebrants across Canada. What is El Qud? Iran sponsored world wide movement to annihilate Israel and remove her from the face of the earth.

 

Liberals going to allow oil exploration in the Gulf of St Laurence but impose an oil tanker moratorium off the west coast. I guess the waters off the east coast of Canada are already polluted with Maritime / Federal welfare largess. What can a little bit of oil do anyway. Jobs perhaps. No way Buddy….gone fishing… just after I pick up my pogey cheque.!

 

Australia Day – January 26. There is a movement down under to do away with this national holiday for the obvious and standard racist, bigoted reasons put forth by the Indigenous folk. The Muslim population tried this a few years back and failed. I don’t need to state the obvious. This will come to Canada no doubt but unlike the Aussies, the Canadian government will fold…. Pansy Poofters!

I have to laugh and cry at the folks who build their homes on Flood Plains or in the middle of a forest, throwing their hands in the air and blaming everybody but themselves when their homes are consumed by fire or wash away in a torrent of water.

“BLM” is taking on “Pride”…should be a great cat fight. Solution? Stay well clear of large cities anywhere in North America.

 

SJ out… have a nice Tuesday but I hate Tuesdays…so boring. Not at all like hump day. See “Pride” above.

Hey, It’s Thursday

Obviously, somebody over at CTV read my post yesterday. They commissioned a poll to the tune of:

“Is bad weather more prevalent today than in the past…” or something like that. Results! – overwhelmingly…NO. Who would have thunk.

 

SJWs now complaining that there are too many white male acts at rock concerts. Well, perhaps the others…suck. Who would you rather see, hear?  The Stones, the Who, or……………??? Hmmm? Hmmmm? Can’t think of anyone right now?

 

Canadian Indigenous MP demanding that the House of Commons provide translation services in French and English such that he can use his native language in the house. If he wins this argument, and he will, because this is Canada after all, we will truly have a “House of Babel” in Canada rather than a “House of Commons.: I say just let him prat on in his native language as nobody in the house is listening anyway.  Question Period, in reality, is “Nap Time.” Trudeau and his minions have really opened a Pandora’s Box here with respect to “Indian,” no wait, “Native,” no wait, “Aboriginal,” no wait, “First Nations,” no wait, “Indigenous Peoples” yesss! Before we do anything here guys and gals lets see if we can nail the name down of the nation we’re talking about.

 

Saudi Arabia deports 15,000 camels to Quatar as part of the dispute over there. 15,000 Camels? Are you kidding me.

Heard in passing….”Every Day is Hump Day” in Quatar

 

Warren Buffet comes to the rescue of Home Capital with much needed “Cheaper” Funding. Did anyone tell Warren about the value of the Canadian Dollar. We already have cheaper funding dude!