Category: Weirdness and Craziness

You can’t make this up!

End Of The World As We Know It!

Image result for pics of next extinction

I heard the progressives cry when they saw this. According to them, at the centre for science at Moonbat University, this mass distinction never occurred and that they, T-Rex and company, are only asleep somewhere. They will be returning you know. I got news for you Virginia:

This just in: Next great mass extinction to occur in 100 years, around 2100, because of the amount of carbon being pumped into the atmosphere, according to a mathematical study of the five previous events in the last 540 million years. Oh you mean this study:

The 3,700-year-old Babylonian tablet Plimpton 322 at the Rare Book and Manuscript Library at Columbia University in New York.1 + 1 = 3!

Sorry, the artifact that just keeps on giving.

Some professor at a highly regarded institution of higher lemmings theorized that disturbances in the natural cycle of carbon through the atmosphere, oceans, plant and animal life played a role in mass die-offs of animals and plants.

And how does he know this for sure? He studied 31 times when there had been such changes and found four out of the five previous mass extinctions took place when the disruption crossed a “threshold of catastrophic change.” This sounds ominous.

“He’s quite old y’know,” a colleague was heard to say.

And here I thought it was an asteroid. Silly me.

Image result for the professor on gilligans island

Based on his analysis of these mass extinctions, the Professor, as pictured above in his lab with an unknown cohort, developed a mathematical formula to help predict how much extra carbon could be added to before triggering a sixth one. Their models, as shown below, are highly sophisticated and complex for the average sod like you and me to understand. And, they are based upon the UN’s IPCC climate science models.

 

Image result for pics of funny model buildings

They bear this out. The UN’s IPCC is ecstatic over this as it falls nicely into their narrative that if we do not do something now about climate change the earth will end by 2100. A double whammy.  Accountability for such outrageous claims? Well, of course we’ll all be dead by then won’t we!

On another heart warming note:  A self-described “specialist in research and investigations at the United Nations’ “Department of Specialists in Research and Investigations” has earned a fair amount of publicity online recently for predicting that catastrophic events will soon befall Earth. Among his claims: On Saturday, Sept. 23, 2017, a constellation — a sign prophesied in the Book of Revelation — will reveal itself in the skies over Jerusalem, signaling the beginning of the end of the world as we know it. Yikes, that’s tomorrow!  This researcher believes that by the end of October, the world may enter what’s called a seven-year tribulation period, a fairly widespread evangelical belief that for seven years, catastrophic events will befall Earth.

He calls this his “Moses Theory.” They tried to interview him but they couldn’t nail him down:

Image result for pics of department of silly walks

The UN pulled out its Mayan Calendar to do a fact check but were dismayed and forgot that that calendar ended 12 December 2012. get it: 12-12-12. Of course the United Nations says that we have to donate $60T dollars to third world countries if we want to stop this from happening now. I told them to go to 6-6-6!

From the who gives a flying F^%K file comes this: Rhianna reveals her real family name: Rhianna Fenty.

And here I though it was Rhianna Banana.

 

 

That’s all I wrote. Have a great weekend.

 

 

SJ…………..Out

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tweetle Dee,Tweetle Dumb.

Look at these two guys. Our Provincial leaders sharing a good joke among themselves. The guy on the right is John Horgan, BC’s new Premier whose Govt is being held up literally and figuratively by the guy on the left, Mr Andrew Weaver, a powerful man who has just 3 seats out of a total 87 in the “Ledge.” But hey this is BC after all. Wonder what the joke is all about. Let’s listen:

“That’s a good one John” Andrew spilled out between guffaws.

“Yeah, yeah and y’know what Andrew this Carbon Tax is political “Manna from Heaven.” BC voters are so darn naïve. They think….guffaw…they think…hold on Andrew…this is so darn funny… that this tax is going to be Carbon Neutral. Bah hahahahhahahahahahaah. Oh my gut hurts so much.

“Yeah,” Andrew added. “And they also think that we are going to put this cash cow into infrastructure…public transit no less…bah hahahahahahahah tee hee hee…”

“You kill me Andrew. Yeah, we’ll just keep shafting the public here and give this new found wealth to the teachers so that they can teach the new math, and to…

“Don’t forget the new economy…John…” Andrew interrupted “that I have been pushing for. I mean Timmy’s is sooo 20th Century.”

“Yeah,” John added. There will be a “Barista” on ever street corner. Wow. And just think of all the Touristas coming in to British Columbia to take pictures of all those buildings in all of those “Ghost Towns” across the province.

“Yeah,” Andrew spouts. “It’s a force multiplier for sure John.”

“Hey it’s so much fun screwing things up financially isn’t it.” John said.  “This is the best part of my job Andrew, besides keeping Carol in line, of course.”

“It sure is,” Andrew said. Bah hahahahahah. “This is killing me John. Now let’s go over our plans again to continue siphoning off the ICBM sorry er John, Freudian Slip, I meant ICBC and Hydro surpluses into our General Revenue fund. We have to come up with a new strategy to convince people that ICBC and Hydro are in serious financial trouble….this is so hilarious John.

“That is so funny Andrew. BTW, you have such nice teeth.

“Well thanks John. Nice tie. Let’s go have a Barista and a joint.”

“Gotta love this new economy of Touristas and Baristas. I’m sooo excited.”

 

This just in from Stevie Wonders. This has to be the quote of the week:  –  “Anyone who denies climate change has to be blind…” huh…huh wonderful Stevie, wonderful.

And another of his cohorts was heard to say” well, like, you know, like, its Trump y’know and like his failed policies, like you know. Those right-wing baddies like y’know what I mean.” But hey misinformed Musak celebrity, Houston voted Democrat in the last US election! “Tee hee, hee, did you say, like erection sweetie, hee. hee, hee, like that’s a good one.”………….Geesh.

Keopectate takes a page out of an Eagles song for their next marketing campaign: “While I’m running down the road trying to loosen my load…take it eeee-zay, take it eeey-zay.”

Speaking of shyte, I just had my septic tank drained and cleaned out. Whew, no problems, working like a sieve the man said. Nice choice of words I said to him.

 

Just in from the Moonbat State. Gotta love California, the gift that keeps on giving to bloggers like me:

An Earthquake in California, 3.4, barely a rumble but: “still wanna say climate change isn’t real?” Tweetle Dumb tweeted in the tweetisphere.

“Well, like, you know maybe, like we’ll see” another articulate celebrity spouted out. “Why is Mother Nature hitting California?” Tweetle Dumber  was heard to say. “I mean, like, we believe in Climate Change and Global Warming, like you know! So why is she, Gaia, like being so mean to us with all of this crap like?”

Well little miss sunshine. Mother nature hates stupidity and she weeds out those candidates that qualify for the final round of the Darwin Awards. When it comes to stupidity, California is the gold standard. Hate to spoil the partaay guys but CC falls within the realm of meteorology, climatology while earthquakes and volcanos fall within the Geology / Volcanology realm of things….so it ain’t weather or climate……..Geesh.

 

Lefties are now stating that cotton, anything cotton is racist. Okay, what about this icon of men’s fashion in rayon and other synthetics:

I’ll stick to cotton, thank you very much. But then again if the alt left adopts this style at least we’ll be able to point them out immediately. Especially if they adopt this hairstyle and wear those hats:

File image of North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un.

That’s it for today.

 

 

SJ…………….Out

Rocket Man!

Loved Trumps’ UN Speech. Finally, a leader calling it for what it is and using plain unadulterated English to repudiate North Korea and Iran and other tin-pot dictatorships in that agust body of Liberal thought. Of course the alt lefts’ in the NYT and WaPo and members of the Holly Woody’s in the Morning elite are having a shit-fit today. Some were heard to say that like her:

Image result for pics of alt left having a bad dayAn important UN representative for some unknown third world stink-pot regime stormed out of the meeting in protest when he heard Trump to say: “You’re Next!”

Yeah, that will do it.

I particularly loved Trump’s description of Kimberley as the “Rocket Man”

Kim’s response? Let’s partaaaaay! Fireworks are on us!

 

New Math in Liberal Ontario’s education curriculum.

Alt Right + Alt Right + Alt Right does not equal Alt Left.  This moment of clarity from Antifa, BLM, SJWs and Pride after covering the latest archaeological find that was recently discovered concerning the truth about the “New Math.”

The 3,700-year-old Babylonian tablet Plimpton 322 at the Rare Book and Manuscript Library at Columbia University in New York.Yup, this again:   1 + 1 = 3

We have been duped! Scarred for life

 

Couple gets married at Tim Hortons.

Order up! Two triple-triples and a wedding: Couple gets married at Tim HortonsYeah, she looks happy. It’s the couch for you tonight buddy. She’ll have to be happy with Tim’s bits.

 

Read in passing:

“A dog u gave away ur sister on ur birthday last year same same same chilly my plaid U want no part of me Stop doing interviews kid,” she captioned the photo…this example of the Queens’ English used by many on the progressive alt left was applauded by Millennial’s everywhere. “I think we’ll adopt this and make it part of our new English curriculum in Ontario” Wynne’s Edumacation Minister was heard to say. She added: Well you know we have already dropped Shakespeare for Marvel Comics. This new initiative will strike a nice balance to that and to our new math programme (see above).

I still think Bill Nye “The Science Guy” and Benedict Cumberbirch, Sherlock Holmes, are related:

Image result for pics of bill nye the science guy                   Don’t you? Image result for pics of benedict cumberbirch

I mean, just look at the hair style!

From Australia journalist Mark (with a “K” Quebec) Latham: Political Correctness is overrunning our country. That’s okay Mr Latham because it is over-ruining ours here in Canada.

Hey Europe. We all know you hate Trump and everything American because well, you know, you have to blame somebody for your basket case economic policies. Of course it is Trump’s fault that Spain and Italy have somewhere near 50% youth unemployment, and Greece’s 1.5 hour work week is hurting their GDP bottom line. Amazing that Trump could do all of this in just 8 months in Office.

Obviousness of the week. “France and the EU hate Trump!” Just like Europe hated the US in 1914 and again in 1939. Next time you guys are in for it, don’t call on us for help. With 400 plus million people handle it yourselves or get out those white flags that are currently in reserve somewhere in France.

 

Out of here. Getting my septic tank cleaned out tomorrow so I have to dig it out to expose the lids. Oh well, shit happens when one is retired.

 

SJ…………Out

Madness

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edvard Munch

 

Why do we have to politicize everything these days. Cripes, Geesh.

Just saw an ad on TV about fashion democracy. Hate to see what fashion totalitarianism looks like, and men’s Nazi style haircuts that look frighteningly  familiar today:

Image result for pics of totalitariansim womenGreat matching accessoriesImage result for nazi haircuts

Emmy’s is just another platform for Holly’s Woody in the Morning exploding heads and untalented jerks and jerk-esses to diss democracy, conservatives, Trump and the general population (us) in general. How’s Venezuela going for you guys huh? You know that model of progressive thought that you guys love so much? Be careful because the general viewing public can only take so much dissing and will soon turn you off completely. So much hate.

I no longer watch awards programs. I never go and see a movie starring DeCrapio, Buffalo (sic), Penn, and many others. That is my choice.

CFL Diversity message constantly being thrust down my throat when all I want to do is watch the game. The CFL has always been diverse. This is not new guys. I don’t have to be told.

Ottawa beat Toronto in Exhibition Hockey yesterday, 4-1. Yay!

France upset at Canada’s lack of climate change action. Applauds cancellation of many of Canadian energy infrastructure projects, criticizes Trump for his lack of commitment to the Paris Accord and then signs a huge LNG commitment and partnership with Icebreaker tanker, Yamal LNGRussia for the construction of 15 Super ice-breakers to get their product to the far east across the top of the planet….This in addition to their plethora of white flag factories…Geesh…See Canada, be like France. Talk the talk and do nothing.

Of course Canada complies and wallows in its own naivety.  But, we are smug, because we are the most naïve country on the planet…so there. Hey, whatever happened to climate change and an ice-free arctic?

Quebec, Canada upset at Boeing for its subsidies and unfair trade practices in support of its aerospace industry yet Quebec continues to subsidize Bombardier to the tune of $1B while the feds kick in another $300M to this aerospace company. Premier says that Quebec will never allow this component of its economy to fail. Yet Quebec will not support Alberta and the Canadian energy sectors due to climate change concerns. They want fossil fuels to stay in the ground. Wait a minute Premier. Doing so will surely ensure Bombardier and its C class aircraft stays on the ground. Hypocrisy knows no grounds!

Schools in Canada want to dump Shakespeare for Marvel Comics. That should work for illiteracy. Yeah, but our Kinders know a great deal about oral sex! So there.

Bill Maher slams conservatives and blames the recent hurricanes on Trump, his supporters and right-wing policies. My comment: Who is Bill Maher?

Many dispute 10,000 year old Hurricane Season. Blame recent Hurricanes on Trump’s election. Is this how Gaia religious zealots think? Anti-Science to the core and they, the progressives, call anyone who disagrees with them brain-dead Neanderthals?

The new axis of “Goldilocks” paradigm. Father of all Bombs (Iran’s FOAB) vs the Mother of all Bombs (US’s MOAB) vs the Brat of all Bombs (North Korea’s BOAB). Hard choice. Sounds like A&W’s Family of Hamburgers to me!………..Explosive Madness!

Auld Lang San… Suu Kyi – a Nobel Peace Prize laureate who spent many years under house arrest in the junta-run Myanmar (Burma) – is now facing growing criticism over the Rohingya issue. She wants them neutralized. Obama wins Peace Prize after just two weeks in Office and he did nothing. That’s why I no longer take the Nobel Peace prize seriously (you have to be a progressive to win it, just like Canada’s highest civilian order) and highly recommend that Trudeau agree to everything publicly while doing nothing privately. A win, win strategy for Canada…See France above.

Indigenous Missing Women Inquiry in Canada is in serious trouble. After 3 years almost nothing accomplished. 7 prominent members resigned.

Image result for pics of indigenous murdered woman's inquiry

What is she wearing? Is that Fashion Indigenous? Cultural appropriation Minister?

Solution, in my eyes? Increase the per diem for all members of the committee.   That will do it. And the government promises a truly transparent (I say translucent) Marijuana organization?

 

Trump addresses UN today. Heard the speech. Honest, truthful, revealing. Of course UN officials, Holly’s Woody in the Morning proponents and the progressive left will call his speech damning, dark, hideous and evil rhetoric. Yes, lets ensure the Saudi’s continue to lead the charge on feminism and human rights. North Korea continues its nuclear arms program for peace, and Zimbabwe leads the pack on economic development!! That is more enlightening. After Trump’s speech, Kim is a shoe-un for the Nobel Peace Prize.

Of course in Canada, after the speech, we go to Parliament Hill to listen to Trudope.

 

A little serious today…sorry.

 

SJ…Out

Imagine That!

Premier Notley of Alberta and her apologists insist the multi-faceted throttling (is there any other kind of throttling?) of the energy sector is necessary to obtain a “social licence” to develop Alberta’s oil and gas resources. “Is that like a liquor licence?” her rookie environ-mental minister was heard to ask.

But in spite of everything that’s been done to get that liquor licence, the current state and future prospects of the industry are bleaker than ever. “I mean who can’t be social with a few beer down your gut?”  Her consumer affairs minister was heard to say. “Rachel Notley’s dream that if Alberta became more environ-mental and socially irresponsible everyone would embrace us and allow our projects to proceed.” says Dahl bluntly. “Our opponents don’t want us to do a better job, they want us drunk!  No matter what we do, all they think of is the next way to stop or slow us down.  “Let go for a drink and think about this,” he then said.

You cannot negotiate with an environ-mental. Especially an environ-mental with a liquor licence. It’s like trying to persuade a grizzly bear not to kill ya.

Image result for Pics of bears mauling humansSpeaking of bears let’s move on to wabbits

Looks as if the Presidento of Venezuela, you know that Holly’s Woody in the Morning’s example of how a progressive country should look like, has stated to his starving people: “What’s the problem here folks. Just adopt the MBA solution, like I have, from my economic advisors! “Let them eat Wabbits.” Maduro was heard to say. “Wabbits in Venezuela.” Sounds like a catchy tune to me. Just like those Looney Tunes.

Image result for Nicolás Maduro

For all of you critics out there of my economic policies, take two of my best. A lost cause.

You know, wabbits chomp on a lot of weed man. Which could be a growing grow-op growth industry in the Province of Ontario. Perhaps this is how Ontario should be handling its weed problem. Just ask this guy:

Image result for pics of marijuana problems in ontario

Ontario’s new environ-mental guy.

By the way, Bitcoin and climate change are the currencies of madmen.

Sudbury bi-election trial. Is this a LGBTQ joke man? Sudbury? What’s a Sudbury anyway? Is that like a new Cadbury milk bar?

OTTAWA — What should you watch for in Ottawa this fall as Justin Trudeau’s Liberal government hits its busy mid-term? Hard question. But I do know how Justin can handle the environ-mental file. Yes, I thought about this all weekend long and have come up with a novel and transparent, translucent solution.

Just tell everyone that your government is fully behind all of the climate change hype, will endorse all treaties, UN governance directives, attend all meetings but say nothing at these meetings other than “Canada accepts all of the recommendations of the IPCC, Paris Accord, Copenhagen Treatise, (insert climate change name here) etc etc. And then: “DO NOTHING.” Just like the EU, China and India do. Canada will then become an environ-mental darling of the “Jet Set.”

Liberals also want to use aggressive but entirely undemocratic time-honoured “time allocation ploy” to push thru their agenda. “We want to be transparent,” Liberal’s speaker of the house, Chagger says. “When we screw Canadians, at least we will be telling them beforehand that they are being screwed. After all Canadians are sooo smug when they are getting screwed because no other nation on the planet gets screwed by their leaders more than Canada…so there! They love being screwed.”

Liberal Government’s Passport system now $75M over budget. And these guys are going to look after legalized marijuana for Canadians.  How do you spell legalized marijuana in Canada? B..L..A..C..K…    M..A..R..K..E..T!

This kills me, but makes me want to cry:  BBC airs a segment on how to do your make-up after a terrorist’s acid attack! Are you kidding me? I thought the standard EU  response to terror was to place a piano out on the street or square with some guy or gal playing “Imagine.”

Yeah, that’s going to do it…for sure

Spencer f—ing Tracy’: Who are the A-listers that celebrities themselves are dying to meet? (TIFF). I would say to those A-Listers: “Be careful what you wish for!” See my statement on Rachel McAdams sleep walking episode

 

Image result for Pics of bears mauling humansAnother candidate for a Darwin Award. Must be from Venezuela. Hey man, that ain’t no wabbit!

 

Harry Dean Stanton died Friday. Great actor. Rest in Peace man.

 

Happy Monday

SJ……………Out