Category: Weirdness and Craziness

You can’t make this up!

Giving Thanks

This just in from the Moonbat State:

Mike Hughes is shown with his steam-powered rocket constructed out of salvage parts. He plans to launch it Saturday.

Rocket launch will prove Earth is flat, California man says. This guy, codenamed “Rocket Man,” no relation to Kim Flung Poo of North Korea, has done this before with nixed results.

“If you’re not scared to death, you’re an idiot. It’s scary as hell, but none of us are getting out of this world alive.” Well some of us are Mr Hughes. You are now the poster boy for the Darwin Award. I can’t make this stuff up. Move over Governor Gerry Brown. You now have competition as the lead Moonbat of the Moonbat State.

Ooooo. Iran sends warships to the Gulf of Mexico. US is shaking in its boots.  This handout image provided Tuesday, July 25, 2017, from the U.S. Navy purports to show an Iranian vessel making a close approach to a U.S. coastal patrol ship USS Thunderbolt, right. The U.S. Navy patrol boat fired warning shots near the Iranian vessel that American sailors said came dangerously close to them during a tense encounter in the Persian Gulf. Iran's Revolutionary Guard later blamed the American ship for provoking the situation.

US responds with this:

Image result for pics of US Aircraft carrieror this:Image result for pics of battleships

Iran is soon to be known as the Middle East’s Moonbat Nation.

Kim Flung Poo, no worse to the wise, gives Iran some advice. “If you’re going to come to the partay, then you better come prepared.”

Image result for pics of Kim Un and nuclear explosions“So you think Trump is a “Hard Ass” do ya? Take that. Ayatolla. Just stay upwind as this is a killer fart.”  Kim banned from visiting California, The Anti-Flatulence State.

Happy Thanksgiving to all of our American Friends. For Trump, a thanksgiving treat:

Image result for pics of kim un as a turkeyOops, sorry, wrong Turkey.

Image result for pics of kim un as a turkey head

Thank you lord for the gift that just keeps on giving.

On another note: is that Mike Myer’s dad in that photo? Hmmm? Wondering!

There is a God:

  • Bosnian Serb military chief Ratko Mladic convicted of genocide and sentenced to life in prison…..
  • Cathy Griffon, that comedian with the mocked up severed head of Trump, complains that she cannot find work anywhere in Holly’s Woody in the Morning crowd. Wait a minute. They hate Trump in Holly’s Woody in the Morning. Could it be that she has no talent? She is not that funny? Maybe, perhaps.  Oh, I don’t know.

Canada’s Miss Universe representative:

Slide 16 of 93

Whoa, I though PRIDE was over last June. Another pic for the swim suit competition. This will be hard a hard one to judge one of the Judges was heard to remark.

Image result for women in burka images

 

Canada’s allies are killing their ISIS citizens. What is Canada doing? Killing then with love. As reported in yesterday’s post if we throw enough money at them – $10.6M per ISIS per – we can make them into a “hosers” just like the rest of us. Failing that, in typical Canadian bureaucratic speak….the government has launched the new Canada Centre for Community Engagement and Prevention of Violence to help jihadists “let go of that terrorist ideology,” The CCCEP for short. Hey, isn’t that the name of the middle school system in Quebec?

Yeah, that should work! …………………………………………….Wake up Canada.

 

 

 

Happy Thanksgiving to the US of A.

 

 

SJ……………………………..Out

 

 

 

 

 

Sensitive Bullies

David Cassidy dead at 67. Man, makes me feel really old. I am only a year younger than him. Watching him and the Partridge Family doesn’t seem that long ago.

On another note the sex continues. This time some guy named Nick Carter accused of rape. Holy crap.  Never heard of him. The accuser  said Carter called for weeks after. He eventually stopped calling, but then she signed on with his manager and friend, Kenneth Crear. Yeah, that’ll do it. I guess her career needed a boost financially.

Cult like Canadian product could break all time “Black Friday” records. What is it?

Image result for pics of canadian hosers' toquesThe Canadian Hoser Toque!                                  Gotta get me one. Canada’s contribution to the world man.

True-dough welcomes back 60 ISIS terrorists. With open arms no doubt and an open wallet. Let’s see, on average he has been giving these questionable dudes $10.5M each – so that’s going to cost us about $630M bucks. But hey they’re Canadians eh? More-dough was heard to say: “We can make anyone a hoser if we throw enough money at them.” Ralphy could only smile his liberal smugness smile of his.

Glamour Magazine’s Woman of the Year are all liberal, lefties. Nooooooo. Not a conservative anywhere on that list. Shocked? Not really. In Canada you will never see a conservative awarded anything. Order of Canada Con – nope! Hockey Hall of Fame Con? Nope! Giller Prize Con? No. Nothing Con. Move on.

That’ll do it and deflect things: Holly’s Woody in the Morning people to rename streets that were names after Confederate Generals. Lee Avenue will be renamed Oscar Myer Weiner. TV programs such as “Lee-vit to Beaver” are just too toxic. Confederate sex. So that name will be changed to  Wine Stein, or Wallbanger. Sara Lee Cake to be removed from all studio cafeterias. Replaced with Angel Food! or Pussy Galore perhaps. Lee-vi jeans will have to be rebranded in Holly’s Woody in the Morning to something like: “Battle of the Bulge” or  “Grant me a Wish,” says Harvey Wee Wee………………… Geesh.

Liberals to re-integrate ISIS fighters into Canadian society. After all diversity is our strength. We take the good with the bad. Okay, just ensure that they be integrated into Ottawa, Toronto and Vancouver society. That will be one way to reduce property values….for sure and address our outrageous tax laws. Eh Gregor?

Gregor? Gregor?? Sounds Russian don’t it? The Mayor of Vancouver is pushing hard for social housing. This is what social housing looks like:

Image result for pics of russian social housingImage result for Russian Apartments

By that world famous architect of social renewal:

Image result for pics of russian social housing

C’mon people of Canada, citizens of Vancouver, Toronto, Victoria and other cities with progressive mayors and left wing councils……………………WAKE UP

From the Oxymoronic file comes this: Only in Canada and Toronto could you have ” Sensitive Bullies.” They, the sensitive bullies, will be employed as school crossing guards. That should go over well.

Image result for pics of antifa bullies“I said, get across that gawd damn street…now!”… “But the light’s red and I’m scared!”…. “Don’t be a pussy, MOVE IT.”

So profound man!

And “idiocy is Real.”

Rest in Peace David.

 

SJ……………………………………….Out!

 

 

 

 

 

Sexual Freedom

Another one bites the dust. Tambor out due to some sexual innuendo. This is the guy who parades around as a female in a series called Transparent. Transparents of the world unite against this craziness.

On another couch, er note, Bill Clinton is reportedly facing fresh allegations of sexual assault by four women, according to sources within the Democratic party. Ah those dems. Remember though if a democrat does it there is nothing wrong about it. No story here, move on.

Say is ain’t so Charlie. Charlie Rose is in on it too it would appear. PBS has stopped airing his show until allegations against him of sexual misconduct as investigated.

Wow, Sex in the City or what. Pretty soon we will not have any TV left to watch except reruns of Payton Place! or PeeWee Herman’s Great Adventures. Can’t wait for that. Or Leave it to Beaver. Oops, can’t say that anymore either.  I mean it’s only those people who have sex on their minds all the time or shit for brains that object to all of these things. I mean normal people have no problem with the word Beaver or PeeWee or transmission, or transam or,or…….

Y’know who would have thought back in the day that owning a Trans-Am would equate to being some perverted slave owner. You can’t say anything anymore. Words that the LGBTQRSTUVWXYZ want banned for their homophobic tones:

  • Transparent
  • Transmission
  • Trans-Am
  • Trans Mountain Pipeline
  • Translation
  • Transformer
  • Transcend
  • Transcribe
  • …….and many, many more.

Like the politicisation of our world, there is sexual innuendo everywhere these days. What’s next to show on the gridiron. Me thinks we will have to change the English language to Esperanto, pretty quick.

Let’s get this shyte back into the bedroom where it belongs.

This just in: Melissa Gilbert accuses Oliver Stone of sexual harassment. Another One! Wow.

And you know Holly’s Woody in the Morning is in real trouble when Mel Gibson weighs in on his sandals…er scandals. Good gawd…………………..Geesh.

Me thinks Holly’s Woody in the Morning better re-brand their ‘This is Us” programme to something less inclusive. Orgy anyone?

Hey even the UN’s climate change conference in Bonn is getting in on the sexual harassment act. Boy could you ever have fun with this one: climate of change, climate of abuse, predatory climate, a groping climate out there for the taking. Its getting hot out there. For once the UN will be spot on when they come out and say that 2017 was the “hottest” year on record….yes. I love it. All of the turkeys are coming home to roost. The UN is not immune. Hypocrisy knows no bounds, oops sorry to the S&M crowd out there.

Then this: 5 signs that its time to change your bra. Well, I can think of only one: when your boyfriend can’t get it off. Or perhaps when Harv, Bill, Oliver, Charlie and Weiner can’t get it off either – the bra that is? What were you thinking?

Happy Tuesday

SJ……………………………..Out

Holy Grope

Maldives Redux:

Image result for pics of maldives

Pretty heavy island. Aren’t you guys worried your island may sink? Never mind rising sea levels.

Appears that one of Meghan Markle’s ancestors was beheaded by King Henry VIII. Don’t worry Meghan. I don’t think Prince Harry’s family holds a grudge. The queen is probably amused by it all.

US President Donald Trump’s pullout from the Paris Agreement will push up global temperatures nearly half a degree Celsius (0.9 degrees Fahrenheit) by 2100, according to a report released Wednesday at UN climate talks in Bonn. Wow, that is a lot of hot air and natural gas on Donald’s part don’t ya think.

Image result for pics of hot gasesAccording to the UN: Trump’s ass in 2100!

Venezuela basket case? Country blames Donald Trump for its woes. Man this guy is amazing in what he can do. Seems that Trump is now to blame for World Wars I and II. And Korea and Vietnam as well. Amazing.

Oh, and they, the UN, forgot to provide empirical, scientific, rock solid proof that the current warm period is mostly/solely caused by Mankind, but, then, they are cultists, and do not need proof to Believe. Nor do they feel a need to practice what they preach. No, they have Trump! That is all they need. never mind this phenom:

Image result for pics of hot gases

Manson Dead! There is a God. Wonder how he’s enjoying meeting Lucy thus far. Now, if only Mugabe would go out peacefully. Somehow I doubt that.

All in the name of peace: “Greenpeace threatens to call police on The Rebel for filming them during the Bonn climate conference. Say no more.

Democrats election logo for 2020…………………… “Holy Grope.”

Second woman accuses Franken of groping her. “What’s the big deal.” someone was heard to say. “That’s what democrats do.”

Thanks to Maggie’s Farm for this:

In light of the frequency of human and grizzly bear encounters, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the field. They advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle bears.

They also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear dung. Black bear dung is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur.

Grizzly bear dung has little bells in it and smells like pepper.

Image result for pics of grizzlies and humansAnd this is why the Darwin Award was established.

Slow news day. Everyone is recovering from the Bonn climate change hangover. You too can look like this after attending one of these conferences:

Image result for pics of parties at climate change conference

Happy Monday

 

SJ……………………………………….Out

Spaghetti for Brains

Maldives. This street has had its name changed to Canal Street in time for the main event scheduled 01 January 2018:

Cinnamon Dhonveli Maldives
“Can’t wait” one resident was heard to say. “Won’t have to drive cars anymore. We’ll be saving the planet one island at a time.”
Meanwhile, over at Bonn Germany, during the newly appointed feast-day known as COP 23, Canada again has the largest turnout of climate Barbies and Ken delegates of any nation. That’s because we love living off the governments teat, one Canadian delegate said. And as a nation we’re sooo smug. “Car-bon….Car-bon…Car-bon…Car-bon.” …and screwed. But they had to change that chant very quickly when someone pointed out to them that their chant really meant: Cars? Good…Cars? Good. when translated from their Quebec French dialect also know as: “What’s that you say language. Tabernac?” Jean Pierre from Chicoutimi snorted.
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Yeah, I know. Canada’s stupidity is so sad that one has to laugh. Hey did you see the Turd’s new socks? And you have one week to get that hand off my knee!
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From True-Dope Mandate Letter Tracker. Mandate letter number one:
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Screw the Middle Class: Reference: New Smoke and Mirrors Policy – Result achieved. They, the middle class – us – are really, really screwed and the Finance Minister is happy because he has More-Dough in True-Dough’s pockets.
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Heard in passing by our expert climate guys and gals: “CO2 is a pollutant that must be addressed.” Of course in 100 years from now the planet will be inhospitable. 100 years from now.” I say that with these guys and gals in charge it is inhospitable now! No, CO2 it is not a pollutant. It is a natural component of the earth’s atmosphere. We all exhale CO2 with every breath we take. CO2 is what makes our planet livable – that is why our climate delegation is a huge fraud.
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“Say what? What did you say Dirty, or ask? Oh, what do I think of Canada’s foreign policy?”
Image result for pics of trudeau at the asian pacific conference
“Well, it’s all foreign to me Dirty.” His answer to the Filipino President. And then there’s this:
And what about you and the Trudeau name? Old stock? and I don’t mean the beer. Are we screwed as a nation or what? By the way by old stock White Canadians he means me and you. Canadians wake up. And he applauded our Governor General’s recent public remarks when she castigated all Canadians who had faith-based beliefs and values. “God? C’mon now! Be rational here folks.” This is an attack on our values. Of course Indigenous Peoples are excluded here because as we know they have lots of spirits!
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News of the world. I can’t make this stuff up:
  • It was his “tongue in cheek” that did it. Gene Simmons banned forever from Fox News Channels.
  • Successful people never say these two phrases: “Go F%$K yourself” or “Piss Off.” like the rest of us say all the time. No, we may not be successful but we sure as hell feel good about ourselves. Remember, one cannot say “Cheerio” anymore when saying goodbye because of the evil connotations to that breakfast cereal.
  • BC’s economic policy. “The Barista Joint Policy.”  “We were just starting to turn the tide on that opposition to everything. For the first time, since white contact, we were ready to take our place in B.C. and Canada. Instead, B.C. is not going to exist pretty soon in terms of investment. That is how worried I am.” in response to the NDP / Green coal-a-listen that wants to stop all resource development in BC….we’re screwed, no we’re doomed.
  • More out of the closet groping. This time Al Franken. See Gene Simmons’ comment above
  • World’s first human head transplant a success, controversial scientist claims. The world’s first human head transplant has been carried out on a corpse in China in an 18-hour operation that showed it was possible to successfully reconnect the spine, nerves and blood vessels.  Success? Yeah, but he / she is still dead. “Don’t bother me with the small stuff” the Italian surgeon was heard to say as he was slurping his spaghetti. “We’re well ahead of the game here” he added. The operation was carried out by a team led by Dr Xiaoping Ren, who last year successfully grafted a head onto the body of a monkey.  Clockwork Orange anyone?  Leave well enough alone.

Image result for pics of a clockwork orange

  • Lesson here? Stay well clear of an Italian medical clinic! And, I’ll never eat Chinese food again. Oops that’s two lessons learned. Then again the new math rocks! I am right, you are wrong. 1 + 1 is 11!

 

Have a great weekend.

 

 

SJ…………………………………………………Out!